Lessons from Scrooge
December 8, 2008
This Friday and Saturday the play John and I have been thinking about and dreaming about for over a year will finally happen. A Christmas Carol has been a long time favorite of John’s for years and he even played Bob Cratchit in a previous version for several years. So when we decided it would be a good idea to put on a full length play at our Church, he put up a very convincing discussion for choosing it as our first one.
I have to admit, I was sceptical. In general, I am not a big Charles Dickens fan. I can hear some of you more literary readers groaning at me from here, but the truth is I find him to be wordy and long on description and narration and short on actual dialogue. So…I hemmed and hawed and tried to come up with a different idea but in the end…Dickens won out.
And I couldn’t be happier that it did.
While adapting the book to a script that would suit our audience, I had the opportunity to read the book over and over, and over and over again. I became enthralled with the messages behind the story,and knew that they were the exact inspirational messages we wanted to share for the holiday season.
The story of the transformation of a lonely, bitter, self-serving man who hadn’t a friend to call his own is a remarkable story of hope for us all. Scrooge isolated himself from his family, his community and any hope of love in his life just to follow his dream of creating wealth. In doing so, he lost the quality of his life. The lessons learned by the visits of Marley and the three Christmas ghosts showed him the error of his ways and gave him a new desire to become close with his family and help his employee and community. He opened himself up to the amazing power of love and is re-created a new man, one of hope, compassion and kindness. We are reminded that our actions DO affect others and that the choices we make create a destiny for us that can’t be avoided. In our choices we can choose love or loneliness.
Scrooge was able to transform the destiny of his life by making a new choice. A choice to live on purpose with love in his heart for his fellowman. And he was able to do so in the blink of a decision.
The holidays are a difficult time for many people. A lack of good quality relationships create a deep well of loneliness and despair for isolated people. Depression is rampant this time of the year. The lesson of Scrooge reminds us to reach out to others and live a life of charity, kindness and love for all. It’s a message that can’t be mentioned enough. In this day of financial worry and tension, these companionships mean all the more. It doesn’t take money to reach out and care. A simple word of encouragement, a smile, a word of comfort can make such a difference in someone’s life. And it only takes a second.
There have been other lessons learned and highlighted in putting on this play. I have been constantly amazed at the pouring out of generosity, hard work and sacrifice from the cast and crew and the congregation. Everyone has pitched in and helped in so many ways that my gratitude for all of them is overflowing. The teamwork has been incredible.
A year ago, this play was just the seed of a dream, a lofty someday goal. But with everyone working together, sharing resources, time and energy, it has become a reality. It isn’t the success of just one person but rather the accumalation of many different miracles, faith and hard work.
When a group of people gather with a united vision, anything is possible.
I am so proud to be a part of that vision. I am so inspired by working alongside some truly amazing people of faith and generosity. I am so honored that they put their faith in us and helped to make this dream come true.
It’s all been too amazing to put in words.
Except maybe these words…
Thank You.
And God bless us, everyone!
A Day of Gratitude, A Life Grateful
November 27, 2008
Happiness cannot be traveled to, owned, earned, worn or consumed. Happiness is the spiritual experience of living every minute with love, grace and gratitude.
`Denis Waitley
In the midst of great despair, at a time when I could find no light at the end of the dark tunnel that had become my complicated life, I discovered an amazing truth. No matter how dark, no matter how hopeless the world seemed, I could revive my state of happiness by focusing on gratitude and the people and things that I feel privileged and honored to have in my life.
I can be happy when I am grateful. No matter what circumstances befall me.
This morning as I sit alone in my silent home, coffee beside me as the sun peaks in the sky, I take the time to reflect on the joys of my life. Within the hour, I will rise from my meditations and I will start to prepare the stuffing for the Thanksgiving Turkey, and then the great bird itself and the rest of the meal. The table will be set with decorations and flowers and the family will come and this now silent home will be filled with the sounds of cheery conversation and children’s laughter.
I am grateful for this moment of peace as I begin this most precious of days. I am grateful for the family that will fill these walls soon. I hold family and friends to be among the most important gifts there could ever be, and in this area of life I have been abundantly blessed. When I think upon this one thing…my heart begins to overflow and I am welled up with more gratitude than my being can even hold.
I am grateful for the friends I have met here as I have made this pilgrimage into the on-line world of writing. A place I wasn’t even a part of at this time last year. I feel honored by so many helpful and kind friends who have lit the path for me and joined hands with me along the way. This community here and the others I have been a part of. Thank you for sharing this road with me.
I am grateful that in the midst of darkness in our world, I can still feel the hope. I can still look to the daily inspirations that come from everywhere if only we will seek them. They make themselves apparent and I can see, I can know, that somehow…somehow…life will turn out right.
Thanksgiving is my favorite holiday. It is a day to express what we should be feeling and paying attention to EVERY DAY. I celebrate this day of gratitude by renewing my pledge to live a life more grateful.
A life that celebrates the daily gifts I am given. A life that gives back- in word and deed- with a grateful heart for all that had been done for me and those I love.
I can never repay all the beauty and love that has graced my life, it’s impossible. The more I try, the more it rains down around me. I have come to understand that it is one of the secrets of living a grateful life.
The more you are grateful, the more you will have to be grateful for.
I am grateful for my life. For all the love in it, for all of the people in it, all of the beauty and art in it and the amazing power of God to show up in everything-if only we are looking.
Happy Thanksgiving.
What are you grateful for today?
October Tomatoes
October 13, 2008
The morning air is cool and crisp in the Midwest now as October paints autumn leaves in vibrant reds and golds. Puffs of breath fog the air from early walks with the dog and crystals of dew glitter on blades of grass as the sun rises in the sky. It’s last call on beautiful weather. Last call on clear blue skies and days that gradually warm with each hour of the rising sun until the perfect 75 degrees hits the mark.
In the garden, the tomatoes are slower to brighten to their orange-red glow. The yield is thinner and each glorious fruit is more precious than the last, each meaty slice full of juicy flavor.
Our favorite way to eat the garden tomatoes are to slice them thin, sprinkle lightly with a little sea salt, top with freshly torn basil leaves right from the garden and drizzle with aged balsamic vinegar. A mouth-watering delight worth dreaming about all year long, it can only be done with vine-fresh tomatoes. Anything less isn’t worth the effort.
Every October, with the first heavy frost looming on the horizon, the tomatoes seem to taste even better. Or perhaps they are just more appreciated knowing they will soon be gone again until next June. I daydream of building a greenhouse over the garden to stretch out the days. A fool’s dream, but one I have every year- designing the greenhouse in my mind, envisioning the ability to harvest fresh fruits and vegetables all through the brutal winter chill.
I want to make these precious days last. I want to savor every juicy moment, harvest every golden memory, bask in the wamth of the last lingering days of sun.
And although the season is short, I hang on tight to each day, fully appreciating the little time that is left. Time to finish up those last few summer dreams. Time to finish up those final chores that can be done outside while the weather holds. Time for a few more picnics, bike rides through the forest preserves, hikes through the woods.
Time for a few more tomatoes while they are still on the vine. I don’t want to waste a single one.
My Dog Missed the Memo
October 7, 2008
The average dog has one request to all humankind. Love me.
~Helen Exley
Dirty Dishes in the Sink
September 16, 2008
THANK GOD FOR DIRTY DISHES; THEY HAVE A TALE TO TELL.
WHILE OTHER FOLKS GO HUNGRY, WE’RE EATING PRETTY WELL.
WITH HOME, AND HEALTH, AND HAPPINESS,
WE SHOULDN’T WANT TO FUSS;
FOR BY THIS STACK OF EVIDENCE,
GOD’S VERY GOOD TO US.
Anonymous
Gas prices UP, Stock market DOWN, Money in the account dwindling, holidays coming around…….. What’s there to be grateful for?
DIRTY DISHES. A Home that needs cleaning, clothes that need washing…a car that needs to be filled with gas. Does it run? Thank God.
I almost lost my home once. A single mother facing the streets with two young children at home, wondering how we would get by. Bankruptcy knocking on the door. There but for the Grace of God goes I. We were spared that nosedive, but we haven’t forgotten. There is much to be grateful for. Do you grumble through the daily grind or see it for the blessing that it is?
NORMAL DAY, LET ME BE AWARE OF THE TREASURE THAT YOU ARE.
Mary Jean Irion
In the midst of hurricanes, flooding, storms do you praise the sunny day? Do you take a moment to see the changing leaf, the deeper green of the blade of grass, the singing of the bird as the winds die down and the clouds part? The returning of the daily task, the normal day-so taken for granted?
Do you walk with alert eyes to all that is around you, absorbing the brilliance? Are your ears open to the laughter, to the friendship, to the wisdom that the world has to share with you?
IF YOU LET YOUSELF BE ABSORBED COMPLETLY, IF YOU SURRENDER COMPLETLY TO THE MOMENTS AS THEY PASS, YOU WILL LIVE MORE RICHLY THOSE MOMENTS.
Anne Morrow Lindbergh
When you woke up this morning were you able to say you were:
Breathing fresh air through nostrils that aren’t all stuffed? Able to walk upright on legs and knees and backs that don’t wrench and ache and scream in pain? Broadcasting thoughts that stream through heads not racked with shooting arrows from migraines? Cancer free? That your family was too?
If so…then you are among the luckiest people in the world.
BEING ABLE TO BE GRATEFUL FOR HEALTH…in all flavors…IS SUCH A BLESSING…and yet, day after day somehow we forget…because we get busy.
So for today, I offer up this vow. Join me if you want to.
On this day, let me take joy in my moments. Let me take joy in the privilege of my tasks and my chores. With every dish I wash, may I remember to be grateful for the food that was served from it. May I remember those who wait for food that has no dish, no table to sit around. May my prayers be for those more in need than myself and for gratitude for the abundance that I have already been given. May I sing for joy for the health that I have and not focus on the ailments that I have been given. Might I remember that for every ache, there is someone who suffers more and I can turn my energy toward helping those whose needs are greater than my own. HELP ME TO REMEMBER THAT THE ONLY MOMENT THAT I HAVE TO GIVE AND RECIEVE FOR CERTIAN IS THIS VERY ONE AT HAND AND TO SQUANDER IT IS TO WASTE A PRECIOUS GIFT THAT WILL NEVER COME AGAIN.
May I be filled with gratitude, joy, love and happiness until I overflow into a river of abundance that can fill the earth so that we may all understand its glory.
Every day is a choice. No matter what happens out there we still have the opportunity to get up each day and see a sink full of dirty dishes or a home full of blessings. What will you choose?
WHAT THE CATERPILLER CALLS THE END OF THE WORLD, THE MASTER CALLS A BUTTERFLY
Richard Bach
I wish you many blessings today, joy in every opportunity and the sun in every face you see.
Will you please be a part of helping Life’s Little Inspirations Grow? If you enjoy reading these posts, please leave a comment and subscribe. You do not need to have a blog or website of your own to join in the conversation! We want to hear from EVERYONE!! and please-Digg, Stumble or spread the word any way you can. We appreciate your referrals. Thank you very much!
A Spring Rain
June 9, 2008
It’s raining as I write. A dark, low, rumbling thunderous rain. Not frightening. The sort of rain that rolls in like a vacuum and cleans away the winter dust. It has been an ugly, long week of rain, tornado warnings and high winds, and yet, we soldier on here, not flinching in our schedules, not hesitating to make our plans for the day, for the week, for the future.
What if it rains? What if there is a tornado? What if there is a flood?
Then we’ll deal with it.
Somehow. We do. We just do. That’s spring in Chicago. It follows the blizzards and bitter, frigid temperatures of our winters, and will usher in the blistering, smoldering, humid heat of our summers. Midwesterners are tough, strong people. We have to be to deal with our weather. Some of us complain about it. I do. Loudly. Often. But it doesn’t stop us. It happens so often that it is part of the daily round. Something expected and planned for. We wear our weather like a badge of honor. It makes us rugged and brave. It shows our courage. The weak would move. The weak DO move. It isn’t easy to tolerate the barrage of ever changing attacks.
The weather here changes you if you let it. It molds you and shapes you the way water wears at the surface of stone. Over time, you build callouses to all the drama that the weather provides. You move on. You make better provisions. You learn to plan ahead. To strategize. You become unfazed to the trauma that would affect your To Do list. You simply move on to Plan B -because you have a plan B.
A recruiter once told me that in his opinion, people from the Midwest were the hardest working people in the States. They learned how to work around things. They learned how to pitch in and get things done. If you doubt it, watch and see how quickly the Midwest can mobilize and band together after a winter storm or tornado. Families and neighbors pull together and get the job done. It isn’t a question of IF. They just figure out HOW and they just DO it.
My youngest son graduated from 8th grade this weekend. We had a large family party in the backyard, complete with two Weber grills fired up with a selection of meats, salads and pasta on the buffet and choices of dessert. On the patio, my eldest son’s Karaoke company had set up the evening to be a entertaining night of Karaoke, singing and fun for all of the kids and kids at heart. Despite the fact that Severe Thunderstorm’s had rolled through in the morning, dousing everything with buckets of water and sweeping through with the fourth wind-storm of the weekend, we continued on undaunted. When it looked as if ten minutes after he set up his equipment the storms were going to return, we pulled out the giant tent from the garage, set it up in moments, and continued on with nary a break in the action. The party and the singing continued on around us.
As I looked around, singing, dancing, laughter, chatting, were the actions taking place around me. No one gave a fig about the weather, the grayness of the skies or the humidity in the air. We focused on what was good. We focused on what was fun. We were focused on family.
That’s the way it is here. The worse the weather gets, the more we pull in tighter. The more we cozy up to each other. The weather reminds us of what is important. Pitching in. Helping out. Team work. Family. The rain, the snow, the heat, they wash away the trivial and leave us with the important things to worry about.
We know how to figure it out. And we do it together.
At nine O’clock, we pulled down the tent and put the karaoke away. Just in time, as if waiting for permission, the winds picked up and the sky unleashed it’s next bucket of rain for the evening. We gathered inside, with the back door open listening to it fall. My husband and son stood in the doorway, watching as the energy lights flickered across the sky in the dark, the rumbling of thunder, rolling low and deep. Their hushed voices chatted as the rest of us listened to soft music, finishing our wine. The air was warm, washed clean from the spring rain, the mist reaching into the house, filling the air with the scent. All was peaceful, loving, content.
Yes, It changes you to live here. You become adaptable. Flexible. Strong. Appreciative of the good moments. The moments when the rain is soft and clean, bringing a man and son together in the night, a memory I will watch in my mind for a long time.
Appreciative of family, of being able to bend with the wind, still laughing, still playing….waiting hopefully… for the sun.
Focusing on First Things First
June 2, 2008
There is the saying: I got out of the wrong side of the bed today.
A rather silly saying, but used to mean, “I didn’t get the day started off properly” and once things started off in the wrong direction, well…down the hill it went, like Jack and Jill, and no one could quite get it back the rest of the day. Sometimes, a bad start to the day is a spill of milk or running out of coffee. ( That one will set me off FOR SURE) or the children will bicker.
Sometimes, though, the alarm goes off and you don’t get up. You roll over, skip the work out, talk yourself out of your morning routine and then it’s a rush to get into traffic, a rush to sit in it and a rush to get out. Life is no fun. We KNOW this isn’t good for us. We KNOW we feel better when we stick to our routines, do our work out, eat healthy, clean up a little and throw in that laundry before we are sniffing the undies in hope that they are clean, so WHY oh WHY do we let ourselves get into the muddle of last minute muck up?
It’s because we are living a reactive life rather than a proactive one. It’s a matter of making sure the garden is full of beautiful flowers that has no room for weeds to grow, or letting things slide so far that all you have now is a big weed garden and all you do is pull weeds and have no fun.
I want my home to be a pretty place with a cheery welcoming front door, with an organized life behind that door, pretty flowers and a peaceful, fun atmosphere. I want my body to be healthy and trim, exercised and well nourished, my family fed and in shape as well. I want to explore my creativity, challenge my comfort zones and expand my horizons as a person, while maintaining my identities as a mother, a wife, a daughter and a friend.
I also want to be a full time writer- who actually begins to earn a living from her craft. I want to paint more. I am inspired by my friend Amy Palko to do more with my photography. ( see photo above, a picture I took on our honeymoon in Ireland). My creative playground is a place where I could hang out for hours, writing and painting, playing my guitar, my drums, hanging out in my garden, or….I could get lost in the world of reading books….and never come out to play at all….
Of course there is the wonderland rabbit hole of the bloggers Intenet. Read just one blog and leave a comment. Then notice an interesting title in Commentluv. Click on it. Follow down the rabbit-hole to somewhere interesting…read…leave a comment…notice one of your favorite bloggers put up a new post…click…follow..read..comment..repeat…funny-how-the-day-went way.
Any one of these things done first…and nothing else at all could get done.
No exercise, no laundry, no dinner for the family, no grocery shopping, no return phone calls to whoever was on the TO DO list. Then the next day piles up, and the next and life turns in to a big catch up game. The house isn’t clean. I don’t know what is for dinner. I feel more sluggish because the exercise didn’t happen. And oh, by the way, now the muse has left me, because the MUSE thinks I should go get my dang house work done too!
First things first.
In order for MY life to work right, things have to be done in a certain order. I need to get up in the morning and have my quiet time. The very first and MOST important first for me. The time of the day to get centered and focus on gratitude and love and priorities. Miss that one, and I HAVE gotten out on the wrong side of the bed. Then I have to check that list of things to do. Then the kitchen, the daily chores, and laundry. Then kids and husband all settled and then exercise. EVERY DAY. Then and only then can I turn on the Creative Juice. If I do it backwards and let the juices flow first, they spill all over and get things soggy. Now, the added advantage is the Muse will most often come and visit while I am in the routine of the ordinary. When I am doing the little ordinary things where the brain can switch off, then my mind can wander off to play with the muse and go visiting off to *wonderland* that beautiful little world of “I wonder this and I wonder that”, which is a very creative place for a writer’s brain to be.
This isn’t to say that I always get this right. This is to say in fact…that I start to get it right..stumble…fall…get back up and start again. But I do know HOW to do it right. When I’m not distracted. When I FOCUS on putting first things first. When I start my day right side up. Sunny side up.
How about you? What is your routine? How do you manage being a creative person and keep it all together? Do you do the same things every day in the same way? Do you have a first things first? An order to your madness? Please share!
Gifts From Gratitude
June 1, 2008
Have you ever noticed that when you are in the moment of really focusing on feeling grateful…really sucking up the life absorbing energy of being appreciative for the gifts that life has bestowed on you, that there are other emotions that you can NOT express at the SAME time?
You can’t feel truly angry and grateful at once.
You can’t be jealous of someone else’s good fortune while being bathed in the light of your own thankfulness.
You can’t focus on your own pain, suffering, fatigue, disillusionment, battle scars, insecurities and past failures while being grateful.
Thinking of those things can end your attitude of gratitude. Negativity and gratitude can’t share the same space in your brain at the same time. You have to choose.
And sometimes, the things we think are the misfortunes we should be complaining about, are the very things we should be grateful for, but the fog hasn’t cleared enough for us to know that yet.
The difficulties, hardships and trials of life, the obstacles…are positive blessings. They knit the muscles more firmly, and teach self-reliance.
~William Matthew
It’s the weekend again. and this weekend I am celebrating an attitude of being in the moment and feeling gratitude. Simple gratitude for the health of family, friends and loved ones everywhere. Won’t you join me in this simple quest of staying in the moment of gratitude? It isn’t as simple as you think. :) but try to hang on to it AS MUCH AS YOU CAN.
While you are at it, I have gotten a start at the Pebble People Page. Stop on over and take a look. It isn’t NEARLY even close to being finished so don’t skin me alive if you aren’t on there yet. PLEASE!!! Also, drop me an email at at wendik825ATaol.com if there is something else you would like to say or change for you.
Now for poetry time!
I am being a little self indulgent here this week with an original one. It is dedicated to all my little friends at cancer camp. With love.
Have a wonderful weekend everyone!
Fighting the Beast
I looked into your hopeful eyes
And briefly saw my soul,
Frightened, aching, wanting so
To somehow make you whole
What kind of monster eats at
Children, nibbling bits and parts,
Thrashing families, stealing
Sunshine, slinking in the dark
I, filled with anger, grit my teeth,
Tears welled up with rage
Helplessness against the beast,
I swelled with bitterness and pain
I looked again into your eyes
Surprised to see your smile,
Courage and beauty
throughout your being
Had been there all the while
Your tiny hand I took in mine,
And soon renewed was I,
Fortified and overflowed
With willingness to try
Gratitude and blessings,
Friendships, hopes and dreams,
Hanging on to laughter,
Remembering Simpler things
No guarantees are offered
In any life or day,
We make the most of what
We can and head along the way
The beast will battle where
He may, we will battle too,
With strength and courage
Standing firm, LOVE will
See us through
~ Wendi Kelly
Returning Home
May 29, 2008
There is only one success~ to be able to spend your life in your own way.
~Charles Marley
We re-entered our “normal” life late last night after an amazing ten days away in California. The trip, spanning the area outside of Los Angeles for the first half of the trip in hotel luxury, changed scenery to hilly San Francisco and then up farther into the hills to a campsite of rugged beauty and log cabins for a Memorial Day weekend of volunteering for a family camp for families with children who have cancer.
There is so much to say. So much to process. My heart is full. Overflowing actually. Beautiful little faces are still smiling up at me when I close my eyes, bittersweet pain still reaches out and grabs at my heart when I remember the daily challenges these families face. The fear. The bravery. The strength. I felt small in my ability to wipe away the terror. Huge in my ability to love and give little hugs and kisses to babies and three year olds looking up to me for a sign of hope. We all did what we could. Sometimes my *could* was wiping down counters, serving food, washing dishes. One day it was helping on the zip line and cheering on tiny tots and their parents who faced this new fear just as bravely as they tackled cancer. Head on and with passion.
This was not a sad place. It was a valley of hope. A treasure chest of inspirations. It was a festival of dance parties, camp fires, marshmellow roasts, hugs and laughter. It was a waterfall of courage, washing over you, bathing you in new priorities, reminding you of the important battles, releasing you of the small unimportant ones. Sometimes we forget that all we really have to do is just let go.
So many things just don’t matter. You can really choose what is important when you are reminded of what is worth fighting for. Family, life, loved ones. Hope…
Home now to laundry and meetings with the end of the school year and a broken down ice machine and oh by the way…the dogs need a bath. And the new month is here and the bills need to be paid and the grocery list will need to be done and Michael is graduating and they still need to be signed up for swimming and ……..
yes….I’m home. And I do need to do all that, and I do need to answer my e-mails and I do need to re-enter my life. But I don’t want to forget. The lessons of this vacation and the peace of unplugging and the importance of priorities and family and hope and love.
There will be much more to say. So much more. Right now, I have only a question.
If You could live your life the way you wanted it with absolutely NO FEAR OF FAILURE, what would your life look like? What would it take for you to get there?
Unplugging for Peace
May 23, 2008
I have been sitting by the pool all week, warmed by the California Sun caressing my pale Chicago skin. A trickling waterfall, babbling with playful birds has been my twitter and my social network. I close my eyes and breathe in oxygen that does not have toxins of technology and To Do lists. I am alone. Unplugged and at peace.
My Zen-filled fingers dip a loaded brush filled with ever-changing colors into swirls of paint. The muse awakens from within, my own fountain thrusting upward and out of the vessel-it doesn’t matter what happens to appear on the page-only that it is authentic to the peace…and the feelings that are sprouting there. Perfection has no place here, the only audience is the birds and the Sun. The Creator and creation are the same…if only for the moment…unplugged, serene, focused.
I open my journal next, words spilling on to the pages as fast as my pen can scratch them out. Free-forming associations create new thoughts, new ideas, projects and brainstorms, some will be discarded, some will be created, some will be brainstormed further with new partners in-put. More creativity to follow. All gifts from the Muse-gods. I am always grateful.
Totally and reverently standing in the golden light, filled with energy, filled with creativity, filled with peace…
I am hoping to remember this feeling when I plug back in. Hoping to put a piece of it in my pocket to hold on to. Hoping to be ABLE to close my eyes and remember the smell of ocean air, the sight of mountains in the near distance, palm trees swaying, trickling fountains that whisper to birds. Hoping to remember that I can BREATHE unplugged, that they all survive without me, that I do without them….once in awhile.
I love my community, My e-mail, my friends. I love my tranquility, my peace too. My creativity MORE. I need them both. I need to go home and find the balance. Learn to unplug for peace.
What about you? How plugged in are you? How does it affect your peace? Your productivity? How balanced are you in your plugged in-ness?
The Pebble People
May 18, 2008
Get ready to meet the Pebble People.
I’m getting ready to take down The Blog Log… For a very good reason.
I’m not building a LOG here. WE are building a community. A community of people who share, get to know each other, get to communicate with each other, share ideas, inspiration and help each other.
A neighborhood. A place where people come to hang out.
When I first arrived at Life’s Little Inspirations, and took the dust covers off of all the old antique furniture and started trying to spruce the place up, I used to think that maybe this was a house. But the longer I’ve been hanging out here the last few months, now I think it’s maybe more like a community arts center. Lively conversations with good friends Karen and Ellen, sitting around the table, chatting about balancing our balloons,something we all struggle with I found out! All of the the art and people that come in and hang around the big old giant kitchen table, with their creativity and creations, Daz with all of his brilliant paintings, and Amy with her art, and Brett with his crazy shoes and Tei with her Band of Rogues, Melissa with poetry readings, hanging out by the huge old stone fireplace on the weekends, everyone sitting cross-legged on the rug telling stories and sharing ideas and things that matter to them…the vision is getting clearer. It is all becoming a community of like-minded writers, artists, and inspiring, warm-hearted friends all making a difference in our own journeys though the world we travel in.
Sometimes we tease each other, some times we share stories, some of us share projects and cross each others blogs with a little bit of this and a little bit of that. ALWAYS we support each other and always we cheer each other on. Holding each other accountable and helping each other dream, laugh, win. We help each get through the day. We help each other grow.
So instead of a blog-roll, I am growing a community page for those who are frequent members of the Life’s Little Inspirations Community. The ones who comment often, contribute and make the journey together. The ones making a commitment to be there for each other, to reach out and be a part of this with each other.
The Pebble People Page.
The ones who are willing to Pick up their Pebble and throw it in the water and watch how it makes a wave. Realize that their Pebble DOES make a difference. The ones who understand that yes, they may have JUST a pebble, but even a pebble makes a wave and every wave is connected. Every comment counts, every member of our community counts and is celebrated and important. Every opinion matters and forms us.
I have been working on the page and it’s growing. It will be a page-not a post- and it will always be there-as a link to the major contributor’s of this community. You can help me write whatever you like about your site and yourself as we work it out. If you are one of the frequent contributors here, you can be assured you will be on it, if you want to be. If you don’t have a blog, no worries, you will be on it anyway.This isn’t an advertisement for blogging. It’s a way for each of you in the community to get to know each other better and tell each other something about yourself.
Thanks you for being part of this community. We are all pebbles in the water, making waves.
How do you see this community growing and what are you enjoying the most about it?
NOTE:
Starting this Monday this week, I will be in California. Partially on a mind retreat, writing and painting and then at the end of the week, John and I will be doing some volunteer work at a camp. I will be writing, I don’t know how much posting and commenting I will do. I am planning on unplugging as much as possible and letting the Muses do their thing. Please come on in and keep the community going…I filled the fridge, there is plenty of coffee and lots of logs for the fireplace. I’ll check in as much as I can. You guys are awesome.
Inspiring Things that Inquiring Minds Want to Know
May 15, 2008
Around and round and round it goes where it stops nobody knows….
This tagging thing has got to stop. I’m getting dizzy. I can’t keep track of who in the circle has been tagged or hasn’t and some have been twice so…oooh my…I’m getting off the ride before I swoon.
And for those of you who have no earthly idea what I am talking about, ( and I barely do either) I’ll try to explain because I know that a lot of my readers don’t actually live in blogsville ( Meaning you don’t write your own blogs ( yet- be careful-it’s contagious-ask Jenny!)
In blogsville, the kids go around playing a game called Tag Meme ( Or something like that) where they have to tag each other and then they write a post with 8 things about themselves in it and then tag 8 other people, who then keep the game of tag going even longer. So my wonderful friend Brett tagged me. Thanks Brett. But because I run slow, I have waited and waited and all of our friends have ran around and tagged each other all over and over again and are so tired now that I think they have all fallen over in the grass. Or maybe they have just given up and headed over to Tei’s place at the Lusty Weevil (Adults only Warning- don’t bring your kids or innocent eyes).
So. Being the rebel that I am, I’m not going to follow the rules. This is-after all- Life’s Little Inspirations- not show and tell. But I will play along in my own little fashion and give to you:
Eight Things That Inspire Wendi
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Waking up to an amazing sunrise that is spreading out in brilliant colors across the sky and realizing that every day begins with art makes me want to stand on a mountain top and sing like Julie Andrews. Sometimes I do, but I don’t think I sound as good.
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Standing with my toes touching a wave in the ocean and thinking that wave is going to go back out into the world and touch everything everywhere because we are all connected.
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Holding on to my bible and wondering about the people who took the time to record the stories and the folk-lore and traditions and the laws and how much they understood the importance of words and history and time. did they?
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Writing in my journals, asking God for clarification and help to understand a problem, and coming back later and re-reading it, realizing that I DO get it and feeling SO GRATEFUL, like a light-bulb has gone off and I feel like I can fly.
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Listening to the wisdom of my elders, who are traveling the road before me, who have learned the lessons I am working through, who inspire me with their dignity, their strength, their laughter, their creativity,their wisdom: My mother, My Mother-in Law, Ms O, so many others…
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Talking with, playing with, cuddling with my children and my grandchildren. Children are God’s teachers.They have taught me everything. They fill me up. (Thanks Chillies.)
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Looking into the eyes of Maggie, my dog. She inspires me with the way she wants to give me everything and love me with her whole heart with pure and simple intent. She is beautiful.
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John. My Husband. Our love and partnership gives me power and strength,vision and confidence. Facing each day girded with the strengh of unconditional love, teamwork, like-minded goals and a best friend who believes in me inspires me to make the most of each day. Thank you honey for being you. I love you.
As far as tagging anyone else, you will have to tag yourself. I can’t remember anyone who hasn’t been tagged yet. Except maybe Jenny. Jenny, tag yourself IF you want to. I’m not tagging anyone.
But I would love to hear your comments here about what inspires you. Please share…What fills you with wonder and inspiration?
A Mother’s Gratitude
May 9, 2008
Mother’s Day Weekend is here. It is a special day for me, special because I have been in active duty now for 31 years. Plus 11 years as a grandmother. I wouldn’t trade a single day. Not even the stormy ones.
Yes, it’s true…I had an early start. Sometimes life throws you a curve ball and you hit a home run.
Although, I didn’t wake one day and say, “Gee…I think I’ll try being a sixteen year old mom, won’t that be a smart idea!” I did learn more from that rocky road than all of the other hard knock classes I took put together.
I learned about unconditional love. I learned about commitment. I learned about priorities. (You learn about that sort of thing in the middle of the night with an asthmatic child who can’t breathe and you haven’t slept in three days.) I learned about money. I learned about not having any.
Yep…kids teach you everything. All of mine have taught me new things. My oldest, being the pioneer daughter, blazing the trail for the others, had it the hardest. She had to dig her way through the hardest clay, my skills as a parent, untried and alone for the most part. We experimented together. Frick and frack, figuring it out as we went along. We learned a lot together. The rest of them should send her Mother’s day cards.
When she was 16, she wrote a poem and gave it to me for Mother’s Day.
I appeared like lightning piercing the sky;
Greatly unexpected, a hindrance was I.
Washing away goals, changing dreams like the tide,
I crushed her youth the moment I arrived.But her love flourished with each passing day,
As she accepted her life, the gift that I gave.
Our life was not charted, predicted, or planned;
We faced our troubles hand in hand.They flooded our lives, right from the start,
But made us two people; stronger of heart.
She welcomed my presence for she did know,
That when a storm goes by, it leaves a rainbow.
I CRIED……
But it was true. All of my children are exquisite rainbows with the most glorious colors in the universe.
I know that all of the mothers out there feel the same way about their rainbows too. So for mothers everywhere this weekend, I am sharing my gratitude for all of our children and for everything they have taught us, shown us and shared with us.
For the gift of being a mother.
Happy Mother’s Day Moms.
[youtube=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yjsD2hO__0E]I have been blessed.
Listening With Ears Wide Open
May 8, 2008
Tap.Tap. Tap…Tap.Tap.Tap…Is this on?
Can you all hear me? OK good. I would like to thank everyone for coming to Life’s Little Inspirations today. It’s wonderful to see so many familiar faces here and welcome to everyone who is here for the first time! Let’s get started then. Quiet, now. Shhhh, we are getting started a little late so I want to get going. If you can all pull your chairs up nice and close and make room for those who are standing in the back of the room that would be great. Wonderful. Thanks.
Today we will be discussing the Art of Listening with Ears Wide Open. However, before we begin, I would like to present you with an example of what passes for listening a great deal of time in our very busy, over stimulated culture and one very creative man’s solution for handling the situation.
Sir… could get the lights in the back of the room? …Thanks.
[youtube=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Opm-qsGxzNY]
Now, I think we can safely say that this man was listening with his mouth open and his ears closed. In fact, to be more precise, he used an ancient stealth tactic that has been secretly passed down from one generation to the next to get OUT of listening. So, the next time someone suddenly plants a big wet one on you after your long and winding dissertation, do NOT make the leaping assumption that you have just spoken the most inspiring words since Martin Luther King. That person wants you to SHUT UP. They do not care what you have to say.
Kinda hurts your feelings a little bit doesn’t it?
We all want to be heard. There is something inside each and every one of us, a little voice crying out to be heard, thinking it isn’t all that interesting, all that important. So it sits there. Waiting for it’s turn. OR it jumps in, interrupting at odd times and then runs out of steam, never quite gathering up the full power of confidence without the other half of the equation. Someone who takes the time to listen.
The highest compliment you will ever pay another human being is to take the time to actively listen, actively observe, actively care about what is important to that other person. Focus on them. Listen to them. Care about them.
There are many different levels of listening and we go in and out of them several times a day.
Perhaps most frequently in our instant pudding society, we do what I call our:
Scan Listening: We use our ears these days the same way we use our eyes to read. We are too busy to read every word so we scan through what we are reading for relevant details while we are multi-tasking. We do it with our ears too. We do it while our children are talking, while the wife/husband is filling us in on the day and we are cooking/changing/ getting ready for the next transition in our over packed schedule. You can be sure you did it when you hear the words, “Honey, I just told you that.” ” You did?…I don’t think so…I would have remembered.”
No you wouldn’t have. You were reading the paper/computer. You only would have remembered if she just told you she won two tickets to your favorite team’s game. You were scanning.
If I ask you how many of you here now think you are all great listeners, a good many of you will be happy to raise your hands.
Go ahead and put them up if you want to. While you have them up, let me ask you a question. During that last example of scanning, how many of you with your hands up, just thought back to an example of the last time you were in a situation of scanning behavior?
OK. Good. Now..for all of you that did, how many of you thought, “That reminds me of the time when so and so said….and then…she said..and then….OH! I wish Wendi would quit talking so that I could have a chance to tell my story. I wonder if I’ll get a chance to raise my hand..will there be comments after????”
Well..yes, there will be comments after, and don’t worry, you are normal. You can put your hands down. That was an example of Reactive Listening, where you are just listening long enough to trigger a response from yourself so that you can share your thought, idea, or in the case of sales people ( and really annoying bad car salesmen) get them to see things your way so that you can get that sale.
What we want to look at today is a form of deeper, more focused listening that has the other person as the center of attention, not us. It isn’t as hard as you might think, you don’t have to be born with it, and with a little practice, you will have moments that will give you very deep inspired connections with others and leave you wondering what you have been listening to all this time.
Got your pens and paper ready?
Keys Points to Listening with Ears Wide Open.
Intuitive Listening
Remember Two ears/ One mouth: It should go without saying that we start here, but somehow it doesn’t seem to be obvious. Sometimes people get hung up on that “Life’s Supposed to be Fair” rule here. Listen close. That rule DOES NOT APPLY HERE. This is not a give and take. They get to talk twice as much as you do. That’s the math equation. If you can get them to talk three times as much, with you just popping in a comment or a question now and them, you are already a pro.
Use Interested Body language Keep your body language calm and relaxed. DO NOT look at your watch or cell phone. (which by the way should be turned off) Lean slightly forward in toward them, showing interest, eyes looking at them, focused on what they are saying. Nothing says “I can’t hear you” more than eyes wandering around a room taking in the environment.
Respect Personal Boundaries Different cultures and different people have personal preferences about their personal boundaries. Get too close or get too far away and you have lost them. Look for the subtle signs of them backing away or moving in to you that will let you know their border preferences.
Be Observant Notice the little things. Watch for the flickers in their eyes when they speak of certain things. Was that painful to them? She just started rubbing her fingers back and forth very quickly and chewing her gum faster..hmmm. But she seems calm. Mixed signals? What ISN’T he saying?
Listen for meaning Listen for what they meant to say, not what they said. Don’t assume. If you aren’t absolutely sure, ASK. In this growing multi-cultural world, different places may have slightly different meanings. Heck, maybe even in your own backyard pub. Here is an example a few of you may recall:
Coach: Can I draw you a beer Norm?
Norm: No, I know what they look like, just pour me one.
Poor Norm. He thought he was listening. Oh well. At least he got his beer.
Ask Open-ended questions Asking open-ended questions and questions that clarify what it was they meant let’s them know you are interested and gives them permission to continue. It draws them out and helps them to think through their own thoughts on the subject. They may not have even known how they felt until you helped them to think it all through. You don’t even need to give your opinion, just letting them sort through their own opinion with a good pair of ears is a huge help!
Empathize not Sympathize, and DO NOT JUDGE! They don’t want or need your pity, and they don’t want to be judged. Accept what they tell you unconditionally. Offer your understanding. If you have had a similar experience, share a short, abbreviated version so they can see you really do understand but don’t let it slip into an opportunity to become all about you and don’t give advice unless asked. Be very careful about giving any advice that could be seen as professional advice unless you are a professional. You are here to listen, not give medial opinion. It’s a slippery slope. Don’t get caught going down that hill.
They don’t care what you know until they know that you care.
It is argued who was the first to say that quote, but it isn’t argued how true it is. If people feel that you don’t or won’t take the time to listen to them, then what you in effect have said is-I don’t love you, you don’t matter to me, you aren’t important enough to me to give up my time, my energy or my attention. I’d rather look at strangers on Twitter, Facebook, You Tube or the Boob Tube than to pay attention to you.
Kinda hurts your feelings a little bit doesn’t it?
Please….go out and pay someone the compliment of listening with ears wide open. It is one of the most loving, kindest, caring things you can do for another human being.
Time for comments.
I’m listening.
The Attitude of Staying Put
May 6, 2008
If you have missed the story of Jason McElwain, take a minute to watch this short video about this amazing young man. Warning…Kleenex alert ahead…..
[youtube=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ngzyhnkT_jY&feature=related]
I could just stop right there. Say THE END. There is plenty of inspiration to the story without adding a single word. It is really very remarkable and heart-warming. But something really struck me about this story that didn’t stand out right away with all the *Rockyness* and miracle of it.
The fact that J-Mac as they called him, was even there is an amazing thing. How many of us, how many kids, after being turned away, after failing to make the team, year after year, only being 5′6, let alone being autistic, would have stuck that out in this instant pudding world of give me my glory right now?
My friend Brett, Over at Six Weeks says “Fail Early, Fail Often”- but hey, come on now, at some point, the majority of us would have said,”Um, I really wanted to play ball here…so if you’re not gonna let me have a turn…Um…I think I’ll just mosey on over and try somethin’ else.”
Nope. J-Mac had Sticking Power. J-Mac understood the magic of Staying Put. He didn’t have an agenda. He loved the sport and he wanted to be a part of it. Every SINGLE year he gave it his best shot and then played the card he was given with a winning attitude.
” At 5′6 he didn’t make the Junior Varsity Basketball team. Instead he became the team manager. The role he has now played for the varsity as a Senior. In the last three years, in his white shirt and his black tie, he’s missed only one game.”
He approached his job not as someone who had no options left, not as someone sulking or bitter because his dream of playing ball could never come true. Not as someone with limited options in life.
He approached his work with pride and privilege. Proud to be doing his part to make the team the best it could be.
In his own words:
What I tried to do is set up the clocks, get the water for the games and be enthusiastic.
It was his job to be enthusiastic. And he was proud and happy to do it.
I’m just normal like other people. That’s the way I am
Well……..actually??? Jason…what I’m thinking is….maybe not. Maybe you are a whole lot of something more.
While we “normal” people are out here whining and griping about what we didn’t get and how our *luck* ran out, and how It isn’t fair, and how “One of these days our ship is going to come in” , and “You’ll see, I’ll show that SOB…I’ll make him/her PAY for not giving me that Promotion/job/pay raise/(fill-in-the blank-with-what ever you might be feeling sorry for yourself for…)” You, JASON, were out there day in and day out giving it your best shot with an enthusiastic, wonderful attitude, GRATEFUL to be around the game that you love, expecting nothing in return except the privilege of showing up the next day too.
The Attitude of Staying Put. Of Giving it all You’ve Got. With Love. With Gratitude.
That…Makes…Magic.
Look what it did for Jason McElwain.
My Attitude, My Choice
April 29, 2008
We who lived in concentration camps can remember the men who walked through the huts comforting others giving away the last piece of bread. They may have been few in number- but they offer sufficient proof that everything can be taken away from a man but one thing: the last of the human freedoms to choose one’s attitude in any given set of circumstances, to choose one’s own way.
~Victor Frankl, Man’s Search for Meaning
Somewhere around the age thirteen, something inside of my brain must have gone haywire. Although it wasn’t readily apparent to me, my mother was instantly aware of the break down and went on HIGH ATTACK MODE to get this offending part of my brain back in working order. The offensive part of my brain no longer working was my ATTITUDE.
IT needed a changing.
I know this because she told me. Daily. Sometimes hourly.
“You better change your at-it-ude young Lady……” she glared at me, eyes narrowed, finger wagging…
” And just how do I DO that…specifically?” I would retort, I admit with a high level of sarcasm, but also with a great deal of confusion. I had no idea what an ATTITUDE was. Let alone, any clue of how to CHANGE it. This ongoing conversation befuddled my mind. My attitude was obviously wrong, up to no good, and in need of fixing. It was also…out of MY CONTROL. Because at the age of thirteen, I had no idea that attitude could be changed, controlled, or corrected.
In fact, I still didn’t understand it for several years after that. By seventeen, I found out that I had a “CHIP” on my shoulder as well. How the heck that got there, I hadn’t a clue. Must have grown there as a result of my broken and bad at-ti-tude. All I knew was that I didn’t put it there. It sure as HECK wasn’t MY fault. And whoever had put it there, could just come and take it off themselves, it wasn’t MY problem…cause I didn’t CARE what other people thought. I was busy doing my own thing.
I would like to tell you that one day I woke up with a wonderful epiphany that miraculously saved me from my rotten disposition and knocked the chip off my shoulder, but unfortunately it took me becoming a student in a long-term program at the School of Hard Knocks. In fact I signed up for my PhD. What I realized as I went from one trial and tribulation to the next in the exciting adventure that became the LIFE OF WENDI is that no matter how hard things got to be, I was -in fact- in charge of how I felt about it and what I was going to do about it. I learned that I had choices. I could choose how I wanted to react and that the choices I made directly affected the outcome and other people’s reactions.
Hmmm.
There was that old cause and affect thing my ol’ mom had been trying to lecture me about the whole time…
As a Man Thinketh so He is…
Hmmm…
Attitude.
You can change your attitude by changing your thoughts. If you can choose your thoughts, you can choose your attitude. By choosing your attitude, you can affect your outcomes. By affecting your outcomes, you can change your life. By changing your life, you change lives for everyone.
In the Seven Habits of Highly Effective People, Stephen R. Covey explains Victor Frankl’s experience in the Nazi concentration camps. Frankl, both a psychiatrist and a Jew, was imprisoned along with his wife, parents, brother and sister. His parents, brother and wife all died in the camps, or were sent to the gas ovens. Frankl suffered the tortures and inhuman indignities, never knowing from one day to the next what his fate would be. Victor Frankl realized in the midst of such horror that in the moment between the stimulus and the response there was a fundamental principle about the nature of man… the freedom to choose.
When I made this discovery in my own life, somewhere in my young-twenties, my life took on a drastic turn. No longer was I a victim, blowing in the wind, feeling angry at the twists and turns that life had DONE to me. I was in control. I had choices. I could forgive. I could choose to forget and move on. I could just let go and think about something else. Move forward. Make a plan.
Make a life. Change my attitude. Get happy.
No more chip on my shoulder.
It isn’t easy. Sometimes we don’t really know what we are thinking. Sometimes we don’t always know what we are feeling. A little later in my life, a decade or so later, my train got off track. I didn’t notice right away. I thought I was happy. I wanted to be happy. I was successful. That felt euphoric. I confused that with happy. I didn’t pay attention. I didn’t listen to my inside voices. I stuffed them down. I stuffed in food instead. I got more successful. I also got more large. I got more confused. I ate more food. I got more successful. I got less happy. I got FAT. I got a BAD FAT ATTITUDE.
I had no idea what was wrong. I didn’t know why I was sad, why my life was a big mess, why I was miserable and why everyone else thought I was a big huge wonderful success.
I wasn’t making choices anymore. I was reacting to life, not choosing life. I wasn’t listening to my inner voices, I wasn’t choosing to have good thoughts, I wasn’t paying attention to what internal scripts were running around in my head or whether or not I was going to let them play in there. I was blowing in the wind again.
I started paying attention. Making choices. I lost 50 pounds. Changed jobs. Put my family first. Changed my life so that it reflected my values and principles, not a paycheck. I got happy again.
Are you blowing in the wind? Are you making choices? Or are you just reacting to choices that other people are making for you? You can choose your attitude. You can change your life. You have the freedom to choose.
Where are the areas of your life that you have learned the lessons of choice? Where are the areas that you still can work on choosing?
Are you listening to your inner voice?
How is your attitude?
Masterminds and Daffodils
April 27, 2008
We begin to see, therefore, the importance of selecting our environment with the greatest of care, because environment is the mental feeding ground out of which the food that goes into our minds is extracted.
Napoleon Hill
The Weekend Wrap Up
Napoleon Hill is planted firmly on my mind due to Crystal at BigBrightBulb this week. She has been doing a series on Making a Million with 1000 True Fans, which has been fascinating both in it’s potential for each one of us, and for the discussions it brought forth. Make sure you catch the entire series and don’t miss the comment section! There were some great insights added there as well!
One of the key components of Napoleon Hill’s theories is the idea of building a Mastermind group of like-minded people to brainstorm with, share ideas and discussion and in doing so- build creativity and energy, making the whole of the group much greater than any of the individual parts on their own. I have watched many of the sites listed in my bloglog this week do just that. Many of the discussions, articles and comments have become interwoven and connected, the ideas and feelings creating an energy and a community that is becoming a being that is much greater than its individual parts. We are becoming our own Mastermind! That is a wonderful thing to behold. Take a moment to peek in on the conversations that have been going on and become a part of this wonderful community if you haven’t already. It’s a very friendly and welcoming group!
Speaking of that, you may notice that I have added a new name to the Blogroll this week. Tei over at Rogue Ink has been blogging just about as long as I have and she has some great things going on over there. It seems a little odd to be saying “For a good time, go check out Tei…” but I think it’s pretty accurate. Go over and say hi if you haven’t been there and tell her Wendi sent you.
Poetry Time
I chose this poem this week because the spring flowers are starting to come up in my yard and the first tulips and daffodils have burst into bloom all around me. It’s easier to have faith in doing what I know I should be doing this time of year when I see these amazing flowers emerging from the ground after pushing through the frozen winter ground to find the sun. Whatever the obstacles, we can make our way to springtime.
Thank you for being a part of this community and being a flower in this beautiful garden.
Daffodils - a poem by by William Wordsworth
I wandered lonely as a cloud
That floats on high o’er vales and hills,
When all at once I saw a crowd,
A host, of golden daffodils;
Beside the lake, beneath the trees,
Fluttering and dancing in the breeze.
Continuous as the stars that shine
And twinkle on the milky way,
They stretched in never-ending line
Along the margin of a bay:
Ten thousand saw I at a glance,
Tossing their heads in sprightly dance.
The waves beside them danced, but they
Out-did the sparkling leaves in glee;
A poet could not be but gay,
In such a jocund company!
I gazed—and gazed—but little thought
What wealth the show to me had brought:
For oft, when on my couch I lie
In vacant or in pensive mood,
They flash upon that inward eye
Which is the bliss of solitude;
And then my heart with pleasure fills,
And dances with the daffodils.
Blowing out Candles
April 24, 2008
Another birthday week has passed us by in our birthday intense family. No worries, there will be more. Between my large family and my Irish husband’s clan, there is never a shortage of birthday cake and parties to go around. Never a lack of reasons to gather the troops, fire up the grills or ovens, let the music play and the laughter begin.
One thing we are good at is celebrating and playing. Birthdays aren’t the only reasons to be bringing out the cake and candles though. Celebrations remind us of what all the hard work is for. It’s the victory at the top of the hill. Even if the hill is small. It’s the TA-DA when you finally get it right. It’s taking the moment to appreciate everyone around you and be grateful for the privelege of playing the game we call Life.
“Each day comes bearing it’s own gifts. Untie the ribbons”
-Ruth Ann Schabacker
It is so easy to get caught up in the work of our daily toil. It is never-ending. For most of us, the To-Do list is a mountain that is never going to be fully scaled. It is a two steps forward, one step back sort of thing- if we are lucky. If we aren’t so lucky, it can be a slippery slope toward self-loathing as we beat ourselves up for what we never seem to get done. Learning to celebrate and play is an important tool and life lesson for success and happy living.
Why Celebrate?
Celebrating our victories helps to keep us focused on what we are accomplishing rather than what we aren’t getting done. James Allen states “As a Man thinketh so is he.” If you are thinking of yourself as a person who gets things done, chances are you are going to feel better about continuing the momentum. If you are thinking of yourself as a loser who never finishes anything, that becomes a self-fulfilling prophesy as well.
One of the best tips I have ever heard concerning the To- Do list was instead of crossing off or checking off the completed items on your list, highlight them in your favorite color of highlighter. How much more fun is it at the end of the day to look at a nice bright pink, blue or green page rather than an ugly scratched out list. That isn’t very appealing! Celebrate your hot pink day! Go you!
Celebrating our victories helps to deter procrastination. No one wants to work day in and day out, struggling though the sludge of drudgery with no end in sight. If you doubt it, spend time working with children or pets! They want that immediate treat, the fun reward. They want to know what is coming next AFTER the work. They spend their work time thinking about the ice cream party coming after, the doggie treat in your pocket or the positive reinforcement and praise that may be the reward. Nothing energizes them more than the prize at the end of the rainbow. But take away the incentive and work them over and over without a happy goal in sight and suddenly the focus is lost. They are dragging their feet, they are too tired, they suddenly remember excuses that are mountains high. And that doggie? It will just lay down and go to sleep. You can’t teach an unmotivated dog a new trick.
However, when it comes to being our own personal coach, we forget to plan time in for celebrations. We keep plodding on and then wonder why we are exhausted, burnt out and have no motivation to continue on. Playing isn’t a luxury, it’s an important part of getting the job done!
Celebrating our victories together promotes teamwork and friendship. Sometimes we feel like we don’t deserve to celebrate. We minimize our accomplishments and successes and feel like we don’t deserve to take the time or we feel like we are bragging. What we DON’T take into consideration is that when we treat ourselves this way, what we are telling others is that when they celebrate -what they are really doing is being a slackard while WE are the hard worker. Well, hey martyr, get off the cross they need the wood to build a campfire! Of course, no one means to send this message. It is an unconscious, worn-out old tape that is stuck in our heads that we don’t even hear. It is a knee-jerk reaction of being very responsible and wanting to please everyone. After all, there IS too much work to be done, and SOMEBODY does have to do it. It just doesn’t have to be you right this minute. When we work as a team and then play as a team, everyone comes out a winner. So come on down and take a rest, it’s not only good for you, it’s good for everyone else too!
Celebrating makes the job more pleasant. Mary Poppins says “A spoon full of sugar helps the medicine go down, the medicine go down, in the most delightful way.” Her secret to success is that she starts celebrating even WHILE she is working. Mary knows that as long as the work is getting done, there is no reason not to crank the tunes, start the singing and have some fun! Why NOT whistle while you work? Why NOT sing a happy tune? Why NOT make a game out of it? Who says we have to act like boring grown-ups all the time? Who says that the only way to get the job done is to take it seriously? Safety first…YES…seriously boring? NO WAY!!! Let the good times roll! For sure you will have more people willing to work with you the next time! Nobody lines up to work with Oscar the Grouch!
Looking Forward to Blowing out the Candles
Remember the last time you were at a small child’s birthday party? Remember how excited that child was when it came time to blow out the candles? Remember how all the other children leaned in close, wanting to be as big a part of the candles as they could be, a few of them even gathering up their lips to help with some participatory air? Children love to blow out the candles. They often even have to be reminded to make a wish! They are delighted, entranced, right there in the moment, their entire little bodies all jazzed up with glee. They don’t stop to think, “Gee, I’m not worthy of this attention and effort. Gosh everyone, really…you shouldn’t have… I didn’t work hard enough, I don’t deserve candles this year.”
Nope. They squeal. They clap their hands in appreciation. They scrunch up their little eyes and lips and blow… hard. Often, all they want to do is do it all over again. They’re in for the game. They’re in for the fun. They don’t second guess anything. They just let it all go.
When was the last time you really let go like that? When was the last time you were able to put down the Shoulda, Woulda, Coulda list and the To-Do list and went out and really played? Looked forward to doing something with the same total abandon as a child blowing out candles?
Remember this! Whoever does not receive the Kingdom of God like a child will never enter it
-Luke:18:17
Life is difficult. That isn’t going to change. Not for any of us. We have to become ON PURPOSE about finding the gifts and presents that each day has to offer, untie the ribbons and celebrate. We need to remember what it feels like to play like children. It isn’t only the Kingdom of Heaven you have a better chance at, but the Kingdom here on Earth as well. If you are having too much trouble, follow the kids, follow the pets. They will remind you. Follow the laughter, follow the glee, follow the wagging tail. Remember what it feels like to play again.
Remember what it feels like to blow out the candles.
Amazing Mountains
April 15, 2008
Ricky Hoyt was born with Cerebral Palsy. At eight months, his parents learned the devastating news that their precious child would be a spastic quadriplegic who would never be able to speak. They were told to put him away in an institution and to forget they had ever had him.
Horrified by those words, Judy and Dick Hoyt vowed to love and protect their son and give him every opportunity to reach his fullest potential. They had never even heard of the words Cerebral Palsy before. They had never known a person in a wheelchair before. In the biography It’s only a Mountain, Ricky’s mother Judy goes from ignorance to becoming a leading advocate for people with disabilities. Her commitment and and unwavering fight to improve understanding and acceptance for both her son and the disabled community as a whole opened the door of opportunity that has allowed Ricky to do so much more than anyone ever expected including living in his own apartment and graduating from Boston University in 1993 with a degree in Special Education.
Ricky Hoyt is also an athlete. With his 65 year old father Dick Hoyt, the two of them form Team Hoyt, a father and son team that have competed in a combination of 958 marathons and Ironman triathlons, which consist of 26.2 miles of running,112 miles of biking and 2.4 miles of swimming. They have climbed mountains together and once ran 3,735 miles across America.
I had the honor of meeting these amazing men when they gave a presentation during a conference I had attended. The name of their presentation was simply:
I CAN
The Hoyt family was given a mountain to climb, one that seemed impossible to reach. Instead of saying “I can’t” they faced that challenge with an “I can” attitude and turned that mountain into a miracle.
Ricky’s first race began because he wanted to help raise money for another boy who had been injured in a car accident and had lost the use of his legs. The local town had organized a race to raise money for his family to pay medical bills. Ricky wanted to participate but knew he couldn’t run alone. He needed someone to push his wheelchair for him. Dick said yes without a second thought, even though at the time, he was in no shape to run the five miles that they were signed up for.
When they finished the race, every inch of Dick’s body was screaming out in pain. Yet he recalls that Ricky had the biggest smile on his face that anyone had ever seen. Later that evening, Ricky typed the following note in his computer. “Dad, when I am running, it feels like I’m not even handicapped.”
I remember when Dick Hoyt shared that story with us, the love poured through him when he spoke. His voice caught and he had to swallow hard when he said, “I found a way that I could give my son the freedom and athletic experience that he has always admired in others. I could give Rick the joy of a person that has been freed from the bondage of a disability.”
And so Dick Hoyt began to run. He began to train. They found a special wheelchair that Ricky could be pushed in while Dick ran with him. They discovered a way to put a seat-pod in the front of Dick’s bike so that Ricky could ride on the front of the bike. Dick learned how to swim-and how to pull Ricky in a boat while he swam- so that they could compete in Ironman Triathlons. The Hoyt Team was born.
The Hoyt Team has inspired countless of handicapped and non-handicapped people all over the world with their love of each other and with their drive and determination to be the very best they can be. The Hoyt Family’s CAN Attitude makes one believe that anything is possible.
I got to spend a few minutes talking with Ricky and Dick that weekend. What impressed me more than anything was the close bond between them. Although Ricky can’t say a single word, his eyes speak volumes. The love and laughter that sparks back and forth between the two of them while they banter with nods and gestures put a lump in my throat. This was a father loving his son the way his son needed to be loved in an amazing way. Their gift of love to each other was a beautiful thing to watch.
Dick’s act of love for Ricky is a profound example of giving someone what they need. In return they have both been blessed with so much more. It inspires me to think about my life and the ways that I can show my love to the important people in my life. I may not have to carry them through marathons or triathlons, but am I willing to sacrifice and make the effort to show how much I care? Do I take the time to focus on what I can give, and how I can make a difference?
Dick Hoyt reminds me that love is a verb. A word of action. A word of doing unto others. A word of caring. A word of CAN.
What CAN we do today to let our loved ones know how much we love them?
* Be sure to check out the inspiring video of Dick and Ricky in the CAN link above*
The Weekend Wrap Up
April 12, 2008
Ah, the weekend already? This week blew by fast, I could barely keep up. It was a busy week in blogsville. In summary, here is where we are:
Getting To Know You:
Welcome to all of the new visitors to the site this week, and to the rest of you as well. I am so happy to have everyone here. The increased participation in the comments section is a lot of fun for me and I cherish every single one! Thank you so much! I hope everyone feels comfortable chatting amongst yourselves as well. Building a community here is a very important part of what I want to do.
Last weekend’s Q & A had a fair amount of turn out for the answers to my questions. But there is plenty of room for more. If you want to participate, check out the post at Getting to Know You and add in your comments. Don’t forget, it’s also your chance to add any suggestions for post ideas or questions that you may have for me. Jump right in! Lurkers, please say take a second to say hi, you will make my day!
We have just finished our one month anniversary in the Blogging world. (April 8) For better or worse, cause I really don’t know what all these numbers mean, we have had 1567 hits in the month that we have been here and over 50 of you have become subscribers in the two weeks since I got that little button to work. As I said, without any Benchmark data, I have nothing to compare those numbers to, but I want you to know that I am grateful for every single one. Thank you from the bottom of my heart for all of your support.
Blogsville Round-up
There have been a few extra-fun things that have been happening around Blogsville this week.
Melissa Donovan is doing a poetry workshop for the month of April that is fun to participate in. You can check that out at Writing Forward. If you like it, tell her I said hi.
If you are a newbie Blogger and are looking for some tips on how to succeed without getting burnt to a crisp, go pull up a chair over at Monika’s shop, The Writer’s Manifesto. Class will be starting soon, so you haven’t missed anything yet.
Daz Cox has painted some really amazing art over at his house. Why not go on over for a vist. If you haven’t been there yet, you won’t be disappointed.
Congratulations to a brand new blogger for making it through her first full week in the Blogging world. If you have a minute, go on over and say hi to Jenny at Random Ramblings.
There have been a lot of other fun commentaries and great posts going on this week. Check out the blog roll that I finally got up (go me!) for some of my favorite spots! If you like thought-provoking posts that lead to really long discussions that never end, Men with Pens and Six Weeks are the places you will want to be. I’m not kidding, some of those discussions seem like they go on for six weeks! ( Now we know the REAL reason for Brett’s new name change.)
Finally, if its a combination of beauty, thoughtful contemplation and inspiration that you are looking for, go where Life’s Little Inspirations goes to get inspired over at Lives Less Ordinary.
Oh by the way, If you know of anyone that would enjoy any of these folks up above or what we are doing here at Life’s Little Inspirations, please pass these links around. Referrals are the highest compliment you can give. Thanks. Have a great weekend.
Wendi
Poetry Time
As I mentioned before, on the weekends, I would like to share some of my favorite inspiring poetry with you. This next week will be my birthday so it is fitting that I share a poem that I was given as a gift on a birthday card for my 30th birthday. ( For the answer to how long ago that was, you will have to have been paying attention earlier in a different post.) When I read the poem, I cut it out and put it in a frame. I have kept it on my desk framed ever since. Rarely does a birthday card make that big of a splash, but this one has meant a lot to me. Oh, and if you go to Melissa’s poetry class, I shared this in the comments section yesterday too.
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Before the Play is Done
April 10, 2008
Epigram
MY soul, sit thou a patient looker-on;
Judge not the play before the play is done:
Her plot hath many changes; every day
Speaks a new day; the last act crowns the play.
Frances Quarles
From the first moment that I met Margaret, I was blown away. It was my first day of watercolor class in college and I was anxious, frightened and fidgeting with all of my shiny new supplies while waiting for students and the teacher to arrive. One glance around the room had already told me that I was in over my head, that there was much more talent surrounding me than I had bargained for. The class was a combination class. Newbies like me jumped in at the beginning and tried to keep up as more accomplished artists painted around them. The theory was that by observing others, there would be more growth. Yeah right, I was going to look like a preschooler with finger-paint.
I began re-packing my things. With five minutes to spare, I figured I could withdraw from the class, no harm done and go sign up at the local park district, where I belonged, before anyone had even realized I was in the room.
Then she burst in.
She was tall, and rim-rod straight, with perfect posture that a soldier would pay good money for. She pulled behind her a cart with three large cases filled, presumably, with art supplies and canvases. “Good MORNING everybody,” she boomed in a huge strong voice. “IT is a BeaUTiful day.” she marched over to a table and bustling about in a flurry of energy, began unpacking everything from the cases.
I sat.
I tried to keep my mouth from hanging open.
Margaret’s hair was silver-gray, piled on to the very top of her head, wound in a long braided bun. Her face wore the road map of many years and many troubles, with lines upon lines intersecting with each other. My brain struggled to keep up with the information it was receiving. The hair, the wrinkles, the thin blue skin with whispers of veins running through it, all spoke of a woman at the end of her life. She had to be in her nineties. But the voice, the posture, the energy, the vibrancy which radiated out of her being screamed No way. This is youth, not age, she can’t be as old as she looks.
I was wrong. She was 93 years old.
The story of Margaret unfolded bit by bit that semester. I learned more about the illusion of age then I did about how to be a great painter in those 16 weeks. And I was grateful for the lesson. Margaret was an amazing artist. What she could do with a little brush and pots of paint was astounding. Her paintings were hanging in galleries and selling for $4000.00 each for an original. She came to paint in class with us just for the fun of being around people. She had never even picked up a paintbrush until her late 70’s after her beloved husband had passed away. Then with her children grown and no one at home, she decided to go to college and get a degree. A random art class had led to painting and she never stopped.
I asked her what her secret to long life was.
“Never stop learning” she said. “Keep trying something new. You have to make mistakes and figure things out. Oh, and be stubborn. I’m very stubborn. Oh..and don’t forget to walk. I walk every day.” Margaret was big on walking. Every day, she hauled in twice as much stuff as the rest of us. She parked at the far end of the parking lot and walked briskly to the room. She had two big dogs at home that she claimed to walk every day after her morning meditations.
If you asked her if she wanted help with something, you could expect to get glared at. She may have been a sweet, old lady, but she was unwaveringly independent. She didn’t believe in being beholden to anyone, for anything. She was proud, strong and fiercely young at heart.
I lost contact with Margaret after that semester. I finished the class and moved on with my life. Margaret stayed in school for another 4 years, painting in that same room and making a decent living from selling her art. I was saddened to open the local newspaper one morning to see the headline begin with ”Oldest College Student has Died…” with a picture of Margaret and one of my personal favorite paintings on the front page. She had still been in school at 97 years old.
Next week, I will turn 48. As I begin the march up the “Over the Hill”, and the second act of my life’s “play,” I am starting to get very excited. The teasing about fifty looming in the near future has begun, but it means nothing to me. When I think of Margaret, I feel like a baby bird barely sprouting wings. There is a very long list written down on my “things I want to do while I’m still breathing” list and I’m adding new ones all the time. Before the final curtian comes down in my final act, there is much I want to do, much I want to see.
I feel like a kid at the Baskin and Robbins Ice cream store and I want to try all 31 flavors. I don’t want to miss anything. I want to know that I have tasted every drop, inhaled every fragrance, and touched every soft and wooly item. Lord, let me experience all that Life has to offer and not miss it in my daily round. Don’t let me wander through life unaware.
Never Stop Learning… Margaret’s secret to a long life. Good advice, and I haven’t forgotten it. All the world is a beautiful school with classrooms in every corner, just waiting to teach anything we are willing to learn, as long as we are willing to listen, down to the last day. We can start over at any time, re-write our scripts, begin a new scene, maybe even come up with a surprise ending.
It’s never too late if you’re breathing. What do you want to know? What do you want to do? How are you going to get there?