I have to admit, I was sceptical. In general, I am not a big Charles Dickens fan. I can hear some of you more literary readers groaning at me from here, but the truth is I find him to be wordy and long on description and narration and short on actual dialogue. So…I hemmed and hawed and tried to come up with a different idea but in the end…Dickens won out.

And I couldn’t be happier that it did.

While adapting the book to a script that would suit our audience, I had the opportunity to read the book over and over, and over and over again. I became enthralled with the messages behind the story,and knew that they were the exact inspirational messages we wanted to share for the holiday season.

The story of the transformation of a lonely, bitter, self-serving man who hadn’t a friend to call his own is a remarkable story of hope for us all. Scrooge isolated himself from his family, his community and any hope of love in his life just to follow his dream of creating wealth. In doing so, he lost the quality of his life. The lessons learned by the visits of Marley and the three Christmas ghosts showed him the error of his ways and gave him a new desire to become close with his family and help his employee and community. He opened himself up to the amazing power of love and is re-created a new man, one of hope, compassion and kindness. We are reminded that our actions DO affect others and that the choices we make create a destiny for us that can’t be avoided. In our choices we can choose love or loneliness.

Scrooge was able to transform the destiny of his life by making a new choice. A choice to live on purpose with love in his heart for his fellowman. And he was able to do so in the blink of a decision.

The holidays are a difficult time for many people. A lack of good quality relationships create a deep well of loneliness and despair for isolated people. Depression is rampant this time of the year. The lesson of Scrooge reminds us to reach out to others and live a life of charity, kindness and love for all. It’s a message that can’t be mentioned enough. In this day of financial worry and tension, these companionships mean all the more. It doesn’t take money to reach out and care. A simple word of encouragement, a smile, a word of comfort can make such a difference in someone’s life. And it only takes a second.

There have been other lessons learned and highlighted in putting on this play. I have been constantly amazed at the pouring out of generosity, hard work and sacrifice from the cast and crew and the congregation. Everyone has pitched in and helped in so many ways that my gratitude for all of them is overflowing. The teamwork has been incredible.

A year ago, this play was just the seed of a dream, a lofty someday goal. But with everyone working together, sharing resources, time and energy, it has become a reality. It isn’t the success of just one person but rather the accumalation of many different miracles, faith and hard work.

When a group of people gather with a united vision, anything is possible.

I am so proud to be a part of that vision. I am so inspired by working alongside some truly amazing people of faith and generosity. I am so honored that they put their faith in us and helped to make this dream come true.

It’s all been too amazing to put in words.

Except maybe these words…

Thank You.

And God bless us, everyone!

Happiness cannot be traveled to, owned, earned, worn or consumed. Happiness is the spiritual experience of living every minute with love, grace and gratitude.
`Denis Waitley

In the midst of great despair, at a time when I could find no light at the end of the dark tunnel that had become my complicated life, I discovered an amazing truth. No matter how dark, no matter how hopeless the world seemed, I could revive my state of happiness by focusing on gratitude and the people and things that I feel privileged and honored to have in my life.

I can be happy when I am grateful. No matter what circumstances befall me.

This morning as I sit alone in my silent home, coffee beside me as the sun peaks in the sky, I take the time to reflect on the joys of my life. Within the hour, I will rise from my meditations and I will start to prepare the stuffing for the Thanksgiving Turkey, and then the great bird itself and the rest of the meal. The table will be set with decorations and flowers and the family will come and this now silent home will be filled with the sounds of cheery conversation and children’s laughter.

I am grateful for this moment of peace as I begin this most precious of days. I am grateful for the family that will fill these walls soon. I hold family and friends to be among the most important gifts there could ever be, and in this area of life I have been abundantly blessed. When I think upon this one thing…my heart begins to overflow and I am welled up with more gratitude than my being can even hold.

I am grateful for the friends I have met here as I have made this pilgrimage into the on-line world of writing. A place I wasn’t even a part of at this time last year. I feel honored by so many helpful and kind friends who have lit the path for me and joined hands with me along the way. This community here and the others I have been a part of. Thank you for sharing this road with me.

I am grateful that in the midst of darkness in our world, I can still feel the hope. I can still look to the daily inspirations that come from everywhere if only we will seek them. They make themselves apparent and I can see, I can know, that somehow…somehow…life will turn out right.

Thanksgiving is my favorite holiday. It is a day to express what we should be feeling and paying attention to EVERY DAY. I celebrate this day of gratitude by renewing my pledge to live a life more grateful.

A life that celebrates the daily gifts I am given. A life that gives back- in word and deed- with a grateful heart for all that had been done for me and those I love.

I can never repay all the beauty and love that has graced my life, it’s impossible. The more I try, the more it rains down around me. I have come to understand that it is one of the secrets of living a grateful life.

The more you are grateful, the more you will have to be grateful for.

I am grateful for my life. For all the love in it, for all of the people in it, all of the beauty and art in it and the amazing power of God to show up in everything-if only we are looking.

Happy Thanksgiving.

What are you grateful for today?

The ultimate measure of a man is not where he stands in moments of comfort and convenience, but where he stands at times of challenge and controversy.
~Martin Luther King Jr.

We are living in times where very few are feeling as if they are standing in very many “moments of comfort and convenience.” I’m sure if we took a poll, most would raise their hand to agree that there are many more “times of challenge and controversy” to deal with in their daily lives.

I have friends at this moment holding their breath, hoping and praying to hang on to their job. To say that it is taking courage just to face every day is an understatement for a lot of people walking in our midst. Maybe you? Somedays I know I can raise my hand.

Can you imagine how wealthy I would be if I could find a way to bottle up courage and sell it right here for $9.99 to everyone who wanted it?

I’m willing to bet it would sell for a whole lot more then that.

Sometimes it takes courage just to get out of bed and face another day. It takes courage to look in the mirror. Courage to look at the checkbook balance, the Visa bill, and the unpaid stack of medical bills piling up in the corner.

Courage to have that dreaded conversation. The one you have had SO many times in your mind, several different ways, with many imagined outcomes, but have never had the guts to have…face to face…for real.”

How do you get yourselves to continue on when all you want to do is hide under the bed?

What’s It All About?

When obstacles start to become the standard rather than the exception, it helps to know what you are fighting FOR. The first step in collecting courage is in having a clear, unwavering vision of what is most important to you to keep you on track.

You need to know WHAT you are fighting for.  Then you need to remember the WHY. Is it the need to put food on the table? Is it that big hairy audacious dream that just won’t let you go?  Given a strong enough, compelling enough reason to get out of bed, open the bills, or face that dreaded conversation, you will make it happen. You will find a way. You will SUMMON the courage from a place inside of you that you might not even know is there.

It doesn’t interest me to know where you live or how much money you have. I want to know if you can get up, after the night of grief and despair, weary and bruised to the bone, and do what needs to be done to feed the children.
~Oriah Mountian Dreamer

 

Once you have summoned it, you have to find a way to sustain it. It’s one thing to summon up a moment of courage to achieve a great thing, or to rescue someone or something from an impending disaster. But what about those times when you need sustainable courage, ongoing power, faith and determination?

Where is it going to come from then?

From the very same place. From the vision. From the WHY that got you going in the first place. This is where many of us falter. We find our purpose, we pump up our courage, our strength, we sound the battle cry of “We shall overcome…” and then-

our courage dwindles away. We don’t have it anymore and we don’t know where it went.

It’s right where it always was.

In the WHY.

Keep your purpose clear and your path will be bright, your courage will guide you both day and night…

Sound simple?

It’s not. It takes daily discipline. Perhaps the one thing harder for most of us to find than courage. Committing to finding the time for a daily focus and renewal of looking at our goals, values and purposes. 

John and I went away this weekend for a mini retreat. Just an overnight in a different location, a time to get alone together, listen to some good music and have time to talk uninterrupted and let our visions and dreams get some breathing room. It’s too easy to get caught up in the daily TO DO list and the drumbeat of  EVERYDAY SYNDROME that keeps us moving along but not really “living”  when you are in the thick of it all the time. Getting away from that daily pace helps to get you back to the WHY and the purpose behind what all the motion is about. I came back feeling more creative, more centered and feeling like with faith, we can do anything. I found my courage out there on the open road.

Maybe you can’t get in the car and drive away right now. Maybe it feels too hard to squeeze out even a few minutes of alone time to get focused. The holidays are among us and every moment feels priceless. It feels like any moments we take away from the task are counter-productive.  However, it’s when time is at its busiest that we need to step back the most. Take those moments to get refocused on the “What are we doing all of this for?” “What is the big picture?” and “Why am I willing to put up with this struggle in the first place?”

Take a few moments to get renewed. Find your courage. It’s been there waiting for you all along.

The war against clutter is one I am battling constantly. It seems the moment I turn my back on it there is something else doing its darndest to start a pile somewhere, be it paper, clothes, toys, or simply that other catagory known as “what is this?”

“I don’t know”

“Where does it go?”

“I don’t know…”

I guess for the sake of conversation we’ll call it *STUFF*. I am constantly on the look- out for ideas and inspiration in fighting the clutter war.

My friend Christine Kane just wrote a very inspiring article in her ‘LiveCreative’ weekly ezine. She gave me permission to re-publish it here for you to enjoy. Thanks Christine, I need all the help I can get in this war and I KNOW I’m not alone!

The Year I Discovered How Clutter Blocks Success

~By Christine Kane

 
I looked at my phone in horror.

“You want me to what?” I said into it.

“It’s time, Christine. You’ve been talking about that basement for weeks now. It’s time to deal with it.”

I had been working with my coach for months at this point. And even though I had reached certain levels of success in my career, I kept getting stuck in the same old ruts. I was about to record my fourth CD, and I was ready to move to a higher level.

Thom was doing what good coaches do: listening carefully, seeing clearly - and of course, pushing me to take conscious action.

So, he encouraged me to start small and completely clear out the junk in my basement. Thirty minutes a day.
One section at a time. Building momentum as I went.

Each week, during our call, I’d report back on my progress.

Each week, I had a new reason why I simply could not let go of some clutter-y item.

“But I spent so much on it!” “I might need it someday!” “I could gain weight and need this again.” “I paid such a good price for it!”

To my credit, I did pretty well at letting go once Thom talked me through these old mindsets.

Then came the week I had to face one particularly significant section of the basement.

It was where I stored various pieces of furniture I had gotten at the Salvation Army and at local flea markets when I first began my songwriting career. A bookcase, a kitchen table, a dresser, and a few shelves. I no longer liked or used this furniture because my tastes totally changed. I had begun to cherish beauty and opulence in my surroundings. I wanted to fill my home only with items that I loved.

“So, Christine,” Thom asked. “Why don’t you want to let these things go?”

I was embarrassed. But I told him the truth. “Well, here’s the thing. If my music career doesn’t work out, I might need them one day. If I fail, and I don’t have any money, I might wish I had kept these things.”

Long pause.

“So, you’ll be on the street - but at least you’ll have that bookcase?”

I laughed.

Thom sighed. And what he said next has been a core lesson of creating my success and happiness.

He said that everything in our lives has energy. Everything has our thoughts and emotions embedded into it. Old furniture is no exception. In essence, what I was saying to the universe and to my subconscious, creative self was this:

I believe so deeply in my own failure that I’m holding onto physical things that represent that possibility. Every time I walk by these items in my basement, I will be reminded of my inevitable failure. Every moment I’m in my house, my subconscious will know that in the very foundation of my life (my basement), there are items that prove I don’t believe in my own success.

That week, I called Goodwill, and scheduled an appointment to have the old furniture taken away.

I’d love to report that I smiled and waved as the old clunky furniture was carried away. But the truth is I was terrified. I was letting go of my Plan B. I was saying to the Universe: “I thoroughly believe in my own success.”

I had never done that before in such a concrete way!

As I wrote earlier, I began recording my fourth CD “Rain & Mud & Wild & Green” as I was clearing out the basement. That CD went on to sell five times more than any of my other CD’s. It received rave reviews. Border’s Books featured it on a listening post that year, and named it the top CD of the year in my category.

Now, even though I know this success wasn’t ONLY about letting go of my old flea market furniture, I have become a firm believer that we each need to pay attention to the energy of the stuff that surrounds us. We need to pay attention to what we are telling our subconscious minds when we hold on.

Now you.

What are you holding onto? What thoughts and beliefs are you putting out into the Universe by clinging to it? Are you telling yourself you don’t believe in the inevitability of your own success and prosperity? Or that you don’t believe you can expand and create better things in your life?

Pick one thing - just one small thing - and let it go. Today!

 
Performer, songwriter, and creativity consultant Christine Kane publishes her ‘LiveCreative’ weekly ezine with more than 4,000 subscribers. If you want to be the artist of your life and create authentic and lasting success, you can sign up for a FRE*E subscription to LiveCreative at www.christinekane.com.

WANT TO SEE HUNDREDS MORE ARTICLES LIKE THIS ONE?
See Christine’s blog - Be Creative. Be Conscious. Be Courageous - at ChristineKane.com/blog.

The Longing

It doesn’t interest me what you do for a living.
I want to know what you ache for, and if you dare
to dream of meeting your heart’s longing.
 ~From THE INVITATION, by Oriah Mountain Dreamer

The words above jumped off the page of the book, THE INVITATION, that I am currently reading. Yes, I thought, I could have written this myself! This is exactly how I feel, all the time, when I go to parties, when I meet someone new, when I ask “How are you?”

What I really mean is, “What is your deepest desire?” “What do you yearn for in the darkest hours of the night when the clock is ticking and you think that no one is listening?

I get so weary of small talk. So weary of yammering on about this thing and that thing, and who got this and who made the latest ranking in the newest version of “Who’s the Best at Everything?”

But I never get tired of listening about what matters to your heart. What you care about, what you long for, what inspires you, what you are passionate about…so passionate in fact that you are willing to march forth and become more than your fear ever would allowed you to be before.

I’ll never tire of listening to your honest struggles or about how you wrestle the obstacles to the ground that stand between you and your passion, nor tire of helping and encouraging you to overcome your fears, nor will I shy away from supporting you when you become fragile and frightened and think that life has handed you more than you could possibly bear. I will listen, support, do my best to inspire, encourage and love.

I want passionate friendships. I want honest, heartfelt, supportive friends that can talk to each other about the deepest parts of their hearts and know that they will not face judgement, not incite ridicule, not endure rejection, but can rest in faith, knowing they are safe and sound in the arms of love.

When I say I am shy, I guess I mean that I am not really very good at small talk. I want deep talk. When there is just chatter, I don’t often know what to say. I melt into the wall and observe the motions, the little signals and I wonder…

What’s going on in there? How are you? What do you ache for? And do you dare to dream?

IF you knew you had the information they needed to help them on their way-would you share it?

IF you knew that the education they were looking for was available for half-price for only a brief moment in time-would you tell them?

OR…would you quietly slip away and say, “It’s not my place, it’s not what I do here, probably everyone who wanted it, has it anyway, so its OK…

and then walk away…and maybe not help that ONE person who needs it, who has been trying so hard to make money in this crazy world of on-line writing, blogging, freelancing, in copywriting…or whatever dream they have been holding on to with all of their might.

Maybe that person IS making money. Maybe that person is working their fingers to the bone, careening toward physical illness and burn-out. Maybe they signed on to the dream and found out-too late-that all they did was walk away from a 9 to 5 job and sign on to a 24-hour nightmare that has no end. Maybe they find themselves drooling over their keyboard muttering “There has to be an easier way. There has to be a better way.”

There is.

Naomi Dunford’s ONLINE BUSINESS SCHOOL   goes on sale today at noon pst. She can help you. I believe that with all my heart or I wouldn’t put my name to it. Or my checkbook-and I already did that. I believe in her so much that I jumped on this bandwagon during her pre-sale. She is worth it. But you don’t have to take my word for it, you can check her out yourself and if you don’t like it, she offers a full money back guarentee no questions asked.

The reason I am shouting from the rooftops today

Because the first 2000 people to buy ONLINE BUSINESS SCHOOL get it for half price. She is awesome like that. But she also e-mailed me late last night to let me in on the fact that three high-profile people are promoting it on their websites today.  What that means is that after the first lucky 2000 get theirs for the discounted price of $197.00 the price will go up to $397.00. and I want my readers to have just as much of a chance as the high profile bloggers readers do.

After all..it’s only fair.

I would like you to understand what kind of woman I would choose to promote here at LLI. I don’t do so lightly. I do so because she fits in with the values and beliefs and the core of what we are all about here. With all of her heart, she wants to make a difference in the lives of the people she serves. Will she make money if they buy her product? Yes. And so will LLI as a sponsor if you use our link up above to go there. But it isn’t her primary goal. And it isn’t ours. Her first and foremost value is helping people and making a difference and that’s what makes her so special.

Listen to her in her own words and see for yourself:

If you don’t have the money to buy my course, I’ve been there. To all of you who have emailed me privately telling me how much you wish you could afford it, how you’re going to try to find the money from somewhere, I am so, so, so grateful for your loyalty, but PLEASE DON’T BUY IT.

Take the two hundred bucks and put a few extra presents under the tree instead. Then go to Problogger and read the archives. (The 31 Days To Better Blogging Series’ are particularly good.) Take the 30 Day Challenge. Read Entrepreneur’s Journey. That’s how I learned it.

If you don’t have any money, watch my free stuff to get a little bit of income coming in before you start buying anybody’s info products or home study courses or ebooks. (As of today, the link for the free stuff is just the free stuff. By tomorrow it will be a sales page but all the content will be in there. You can go back as often as you want and I’m never going to take it down.)
~Naomi Dunford

This is the type of person I choose to promote. At the very, very least, do yourself a favor and read all the free stuff. She has a lot of it and it will help you.

However, if you can afford it, if you have a goal, and a vision of the kind of life you want to live and are in need of someone you can trust who has the business course already built that can take you step by step to the future you have been dreaming of, Online Business School  is what you need. Naomi went from a struggling mother to a successful business owner making $200.000 a year.  Sound good to you? I’ll let her tell you how she did that. It’s a great story. Don’t miss it.

This is a rewrite of an article written back at the first LLI, Planning for the Fog,  re-posted here today for all of our NaNoWriMo writers and everyone else needing a little extra encouragement as we prepare to enter the long stretch called the holidays.

Stand Up to Your Obstacles and Do Something About Them, You Will Find that They Haven’t Half the Strength You Thought They Have.
~Norman Vincent Peale

Obstacles.

Just when you thought you were getting somewhere…along comes some blip on the screen, some change in the plan, some unforeseen disaster that veers you off the course.

“Oh well…better luck next time…”

Many Monday morning diets have been blown a Tuesday goodbye kiss due to obstacles in the road. Many other well intended plans, started with enthusiasm and desire, lay dead in the path of these dreaded roadblocks.

What’s a person to do? You can’t plan for obstacles. Right? They just happen… They’re a random event. Luck of the draw….It’s not like it’s our fault or anything.

“Oh well…better luck next time…”

I’ll let you in on a secret that I have in my little bag of life’s lessons. You won’t have better luck next time. There is another obstacle coming. And another one after that. It’s this little thing they call LIFE…and…

The only thing that is going to make a difference next time is how prepared you are to deal with it.

The remarkable Florence Chadwick had already made a place for herself in history by being the first woman to swim the English Channel, when she made her decision to swim from Catalina Island to the California coast. This was a woman of proven persistence, goal-setting ability and driven excellence. There was every reason to believe in her ability to meet her next challenge.

On the 4th of July in 1952, as millions watched at home on national television and with family and crew by her side, Florence began her swim. The water was icy cold.  Sharks hovered around her, being kept at bay by rifle shots fired from the crew supporting her. A deep, murky fog enveloped the water, rendering Florence unable to see anything in front of her.

Cheers and cries of support rang out from her family and the crew in the boats above, urging her to carry on, but all Florence could focus on was the fog that blinded her path. Defeated, she asked to be taken out of the water. It was the first time she had ever given in. The first time she had ever quit. 

Later, from the comfort of the boat, Florence was dismayed to learn that she had given up only 1/2 mile from the shore of victory. When interviewed by a reporter, she told him that it wasn’t fatigue or cold water that had stopped her, but simply that she had lost sight of the vision in her mind, and had been blinded by the fog.

A short two months later, Florence Chadwick returned to try again. She was not lucky enough to have clear skies and visibility. The same obstacle of blinding fog also returned to challenge her once more. This time, Florence was prepared. She had rehearsed over and over in her mind what the end result would look like. She imagined the fog and how she would swim through it and keep her mind firmly focused on the goal.  As she swam, she was able to remind herself that the fog did not change the end result; the shoreline was there whether she could see it or not. She just had to remain faithful to continue swimming and she would reach it.

This time Florence did reach the shore. Despite the fog, she swam there in a straight path and broke the all time speed record set before her by the men by two full hours!

Obstacles come. Always. Wearing one disguise or another, they step in our path to block the goal that we had set before us. Without a clear and carefully defined vision, it is hard to defeat them. Like a child’s monster in the closet, they appear to be overwhelming, frightening  and larger than life.

More often than not, they don’t really exist the way we thought they did in our mind anyway. With rehearsed planning and focused vision, they can be reduced to a minor inconvenience, a lesson to be learned or sometimes even an opportunity that turns out to help us on our way.

The largest obstacle that we truly face is our own defeated attitudes.

When she was in kindergarten, my sister wrote a story.

I went into a cave and there was a bear! I tried to get out of the window but there wasn’t any. I tried to get out the door but the bear was blocking it. So, I sat down.

the end

The teacher wrote with her red pen, “And then what???”

This story was one of my first collections to be placed in the life’s lesson bag. And then what? What comes Next? How many times do we see an obstacle and then just sit down?

When you start to approach life from the angle that an obstacle is coming, so plan ahead…it isn’t the same as negative thinking. It’s being prepared. It’s making sure you have what you need in your suitcase to complete your journey. Thinking through in your mind, what types of things and experiences could possibly occur along the way and what you might need to do to stay focused and on plan.

It’s the constructive use of “What if?” instead of using it to worry and defeat us before we start.

It looks like this:

Finish these sentences for your goals and plans:

1. The end result of my goal looks like…..

2. The steps I need to take are…..

3. Possible obstacles that could stop me from reaching my goals are…

4. My plan for diffusing those obstacles is…..

5. The language I will use and the way it will look when I overcome the obstacles is…

Then, the more time you spend visualizing and seeing yourself succeeding in your mind, and overcoming those obstacles, actually rehearsing in your mind the language you would use, and actions that you would take to overcome those obstacles, the smaller and smaller those obstacles will be when they arrive. Your subconscious will already be engaged and know what to do.

Life happens. You won’t be able to predict and plan for everything. Some things are just learning experiences. Even an accomplished swimmer like Florence hadn’t planned for the fog the first time through. But she didn’t let it keep her out of the game either. She was back within a few months, mentally stronger, armed with knowledge and a better plan.

She won. So can you.

Obstacles are coming, are you planning ahead?

I had glady made that choice, stubbornly fighting off the other options that life had presented to me, believing with a faith that only youth can provide that I was fully capable of providing all things necessary for the health, welfare and love of my child as a single mother.

A sickly child with asthma and immune problems made that even more challenging. I spent many of those first nights watching her breath with concave lungs struggling for air inside a huge tented crib filled with pumped in air in the children’s ward at the hospital.

I had been a good student before I made the choice to be a mother instead. Still, a sophmore education and the label of high school drop out isn’t a winning combination on most high paying job applications. And should there be any school age kids reading this-let me take a moment out right now to say- Stay in School. The road I chose wasn’t pretty, it wasn’t easy, there weren’t any parties, very little time for fun, and even less time for sleep.

Although I love my daughter with all my heart, there are easier ways to get to where I am today.

However, when I sift back through my life and review the life lessons that I learned along the way, there is no doubt, that the biggest bag of lessons were gathered together in those early days. Lessons about survival, lessons about delayed gratification, lessons about compassion, forgiveness, budgeting, the value of a dollar, the importance of family and friends and the amazing gift of unconditional love.

There isn’t a single day of my life that I’m not pulling one or more of those early lessons out of the bag and applying them to my life still today. They are as important now, creeping up to age fifty as they were in the pea-green days of my youth. They are timeless and the basis for everything I believe in.

In the last several months, one of those lessons keeps drifting to my mind on a daily basis more than ever.  The world’s constant obsession, fear and chatter about world recession, world depression, cut-backs, banckrupcies and daily crisis has many people ducking for cover. “Woe is the world so, therefore, woe is me” is the daily whine that everyone seems to be drinking.

Well, I don’t want to be a party-pooper but no thank you, I don’t want any.

Perhaps our newly- elected visionary will bring about the answers everyone is looking for. I hope so. But I haven’t been waiting for my Knight in Shining Armour to come and make my life all better and frankly neither should you.

ObamaVision or not, the road to success is still going to be paved with the sweat of our own hands. It always has been, and it always will be.

Why do I think this? Well, my daughter was born in 1977. Any of you who might remember the late seventies may remember long gas lines, embarrasing politics, interest rates that soared into double digit territory, stagnation ( a lovely word isn’t it?) and a host of other lovely things designed to scare the productivity right out of us.

And I was perfectly positioned to fall to the bottom of the barrel.

But I didn’t. I succeded. I beat the odds.

I went to beauty school during the mornings and I worked on getting a hairdresser’s license. When I got back home, I would spend some time with my daughter. In the evenings, I went to work at a hot dog shop, selling hot dogs. On the weekends, I worked at our family’s beauty shop, better learning the trade so I would be ready when I got out to hit the ground running. Soon, as my hours were piling up at school, my hot dog “career” was taking off. Yes, I could have settled for slinging the dogs in a bun and getting back home, but I took the time to learn how the business worked behind the scenes. I asked lots of questions. I read books on small business manegement. I figured things out. I came up with ideas. Within three months I was an assistant manager. Three months more, when the manager quit,  I was promoted to manager and tripled my pay. On the weekends at our family’s shop, I asked more questions, I learned how to run the books, how all the products worked, what went with this…what went with that…How to do color, how to do specialized perms that most hairdressers didn’t know how to do. I read books and I didn’t settle for the information that beauty school had to teach me.

I didn’t have time to grow my business at a leisurely pace. I had a child depending on me.

Fast forward nine months. I graduated from beauty school, had my license, had developed relationships already at both the hot dog shop and the beauty shop and on the first week as a licensed hairdresser, I had a healthy clientele ready and waiting and a good income coming in as well as the manager’s job at the hot dog shop.

I had kept my budget to the same exact amount as it had been when I first moved in, so the extra money could go into savings and paying the medical bills, which I had worked out a monthly payment plan on. Fast forward another year and I took my GED and went to college. Quit the hot dog job, got a job tuturing other college kids in the school library which paid my tuition, became the manager at the salon and with a few years tripled the employees and the value of the company. Graduated from college, grew my management and sales skills into other positions  that further increased my experiences and marketablity.

Oh, and I saved enough to buy a house at age 20, with interest rates at the cheap old rate of 18%.

Why am I sharing this story? Two reasons. One, to tell you that hard work and determination CAN pay off, even during times that look a lot more daunting than these.

The second is to mention that if the route I took sounds a little exhausting ( and trust me, it was) there is a MUCH EASIER WAY to get where you want to go in this day and age.

Keep in mind that I didn’t even own a car. I walked or finagled a ride to everywhere I went. There was no such thing as getting up in the morning and firing up your lap top to see what options were available.

Now there is. These days, I don’t have to work quite that hard at success. I turn on my computer, I read, I pay attention and I listen to the right people.

IF you were paying close attention to my story, maybe some of you caught that the common thread of reading, paying attention and listening to the right people was woven in to everything I did back then too, but then, I had to walk to get there. Now…I click on to Naomi Dunford’s free classes and thank my lucky stars I don’t have to “Walk Uphill without Shoes” like in the olden’ days to Canada to get the best advice there is for making a lot of money right from the comfort of my computer.

I’m heading over there now. Will you join me? It’s a heck of a lot easier on the feet! Click on her post and let her help you get where you want to go!

 < Why We’re Broke and How To Fix It>

We sat down as a family to watch live television. It won’t take a psychic to figure out what we were watching. It was the same thing on every single channel. We were watching the map of the United States of America change colors from grey and black to blue and red. We were watching the results of the 2008 election.

Not turning on the TV until almost 8:45 Chicago time meant that we had missed the slow part of the evening and enjoyed a peaceful quiet family night. We tuned in just as things got pretty exciting. I had my laptop humming along next to me, keeping track of incoming data and twitter while the family flipped channels on the tube. I would report to them and they would report to me. We would see how close mainstream TV and and the web were keeping up with each other. ( not too bad last night, I think.) It was fun.

Then, California and the west coast closed their polling places and everything hit the fan at once and Obama was immediately declared the winner before anyone could turn the lights out in the polling locations.

California, with Zero percent of the vote in had declared him the winner! IN AN INSTANT!

What an amazing world….

How fun was that! ?!?!

We let the kids stay up late, way past their bedtimes as we were all glued to the TV watching our political process in action. My youngest ones at home are 11 and 14. We all sat huddled together with the two dogs as John McCain came out and gave a very gracious and generous speech congratulating Senator, now President Elect Obama, on his victory. I felt proud of him once again, proud of his service, proud of him as an American and grateful for the olive branch that he extended across party lines to begin the process of uniting this country for the huge tasks ahead.

Then, Obama, President-elect Obama, entering the stage with Michelle, his two beautiful girls, (who my daughter referred to as the future “angels of the white house” ,) and the crowd of supporters, spanning out as far out into the distance as the cameras could reach.

It felt like we were witnessing a miracle. And as we listened, and as he spoke, weaving his words with the magic of hope, promise and vision, I saw in my children’s eyes a look that I remember from my own childhood so very long ago.

A recognition, that no matter what you you thought or believed hours ago, if you were a part of last night, you witnessed a life-shifting moment in our culture that changes everything. There was a ripple that began to spread and grow until it became a wave and then a tsunami and eventually was felt as a tremor the entire world over last night. You could feel it in the air, you could see it on the faces of those watching, in the posture of those listening, in the hearts of those believing.

A new day dawned this morning. A new day, with a new type of faith. People woke up feeling like they belong. Like they have a voice, like they matter. Like there is a banner shining brightly that says YES YOU CAN to their hopes, dreams, ambitions and needs that will not put them down, trample them to the ground or tell them no you can’t, you have no hope.

Was it always there? Probably yes. It just took a man with the belief in himself to show us the way.

My children will never forget last night. Neither will I. Before they went to bed, we talked about how some moments in history are just so special that they stay with you forever.

They asked me what the closest thing to this was for me in my childhood.

My answer was instant.

I watched Neil Armstrong walk on the Moon.

I was nine years old. I sat huddled in front of an old snowy black and white TV screen with my entire family and several of our neighbors, all pressed close together to hear the garbled, scratchy sound. I remember the tight constricted feeling in my chest as he hovered over the spacecraft steps, the burning in my lungs as I finally gasped when he took that first step and I realized I had been holding my breath…maybe unknowingly terrified as a child that there WOULD be Martians or that he would spontaneously combust on impact with the ground. Then he took another step and touched ground and we witnessed that  floaty anti-gravity walk that has become so famous now but that when seeing it for the very first time was nothing short of miraculous.

Then the words…ONE SMALL STEP FOR MAN, ONE GIANT STEP FOR MANKIND…

I remember that moment, feeling as if I could burst from the pride of being an American. Burst from the exhilaration of the MIRACLE that was occurring before my very eyes. To think that …A KABILLION miles a way..a man was STEPPING and TALKING on the moon and it was coming to us LIVE on a snowy black and white TV in our living room was BEYOND any comprehension my nine year old brain could fathom.

Frankly, my almost fifty year old brain still struggles with it as well. But…we as a world are a little more jaded with our miracles these days…

Last night…was one of those moments again. One of those nights that in the somewhere distant future you will say…”I remember exactly where I was and exactly how I felt and…it was amazing.”

I could almost hear Neil Armstrong whispering in the background.

Back and forth. Small feet pushing into the air, reaching, calves and legs that stretch and then-pull back, commanding that pocket of air to follow along, backward, back, back and then swoosh…head thrown back, arms, fingers gripping the chain, full body press, and legs, feet , stretched-out toes, press to the sky, commanding the air, communing with birds, surpassing the top of the crosspole and before you take that eventual dip back one more time…you feel it…the sureness of it. The rush of it. The truth of it.

You CAN FLY. You were meant to fly. You were born to fly through the air on wings as birds.

You knew it as a child. You felt it. You believed it. You knew it on the swingset. You knew it standing on tree branches and perched at the top of the towers that you climbed. “Look at me…I can FLY!”

And in your dreams, you still know it is so.

So you fell a few times. Logic and the world around us tries to tell you it isn’t so.

You can’t fly…you aren’t a bird. You weren’t meant for greatness and dreams and faith. Put your feet on the ground and rest your mind on solid things….Isn’t that what the world tries to grind into us day after day, newscast after newscast?

I say…

Poppycock.

I came across this today. I wanted to share it with you. I wanted to remind you that once, we all KNEW we could fly. WE all KNEW we were capable of remarkable things. We all KNEW we possessed inside of us the greatness to achieve anything we put our minds, actions and faith to.

CAN, WILL and BELIEVE, My friends.

Together!

YOU CAN FLY IF YOU WANT TO

You can fly if you try, you can soar with the eagles if you dare, or you can run with
the turkey’s who don’t care.

You can be a total winner even if you’re a beginner, if you think you can you can, if
you think you can, you can.

You can wear the gold medallion, you can ride your own Black Stallion, if you think you can you can, if you think you can, you can.

You can raise your C’s up to A’s and your F’s to D’s maybe even be in the school
play, if you think you can you can, if you think you can, you can.

It’s not your talent or your gift at birth, it’s not your bank book that determines your
worth. It isn’t in the color of your skin but it’s your attitude that lets you win.

You can go beyond exhaustion, you can win the marathon in Boston, if you think
you can you can, if you think you can, you can.

You could have finished off Darth Vadar, you can out debate Ralph Nadar, you can profit through inflation and you can direct this nation, if you think you can, you can.

It doesn’t matter if you’ve won before, it makes no difference what the half-time
score. It’s never over until the final gun if there was one so you keep on trying and
you’ll find that you’ve won.

You grab your dream and then believe it, go out and work and you’ll achieve it if
you think you can, you can, if you think you can you can.

You believe in God and you’re half-way there, you believe in your family and you
country and you’re three-quarters there, and then you believe in yourself and you’re
nine-tenths there, but you believe and you’ll become that by which men and women
live…which is the most powerful thing of all; and that is FAITH - it is the moving
cause of all action.

~Denis E. Waitley with Darol Wagstaff

For awhile around here, the water is going to be a little less ebb and flow and more like a raging storm or full on Forest Fire as I turn the RADAR FOCUS on to High speed. John and I have started directing a full length production of Charles Dickens’ A CHRISTMAS CAROL, which will be presented here in December. This production will be the end result of a long-term vision and goal that has been living in our brains for quite awhile. Along with the rest of my life, this is going to be a full time committment for me and may slow things down in the writing here and visiting of of all of the blogs in my feed reader. I beg you to hang in there for the short term, while I turn up the flames and make this dream come true!!

I have been meaning to highlight some of the posts that were buried in the archives from our old house that only my six subscribers, and my kids, at the time ever saw, so now seems like a good time.

Especially this first one…since after all this time…it’s very MUCH still true.

Catch on Fire but Don’t Burn the Laundry

originally posted on March 27, 2008

” Catch on Fire with Enthusiasm and People will Come from Miles to Watch You Burn”

John Wesley

There are days that the moment my feet hit the floor, I am driven by the desire, the passion, the very need, to succeed at my mission. Whatever that mission may be at the time, I can not drive the singular focus out of my head. It is a drumbeat, a rhythm, an obsession that calls to me. Wherever I am, whatever I am doing, I am pulled back to the mission, the plan…the goal…and I am practically useless to anyone or anything else.

My close friends and family call this Wendi’s “radar focus”. It is my best secret for success and my biggest flaw all rolled into one.

I can’t help it.

One thing I am an expert on is enthusiasm. When I catch on fire, its hard to put me out. It can take entire fire departments to derail me and get me back to the land of the living. Smoke ends up all over the place, and things can end up in a big mess as I probably haven’t even looked around at anything else other than my goal for a long time.

One of the things that I have been working in the past few years is balancing my surge of enthusiasm with living in the day to day”real world”. The simple ( well, simple for other people) act of managing parenting and household tasks, along with working, while in the throws of unbridled enthusiasm for a project is very difficult for me to balance. For most people, this is where the enthusiasm starts to ebb away. For me, this is where the laundry starts to pile up.

Often, I get comments from people that know me regarding my enthusiasm. “Man, I wish I had half of your enthusiasm” they say.

That part is easy. Here you go:

Wendi’s Tips for Getting out of Bed on Fire:

1. Find your passion. Name something you feel very strongly or passionately about or something that you have always wanted to do. Journal it, daydream it, play the “If I could do anything I wanted and fear or money was no object, what would it be?” game.  Ask yourself what you want your legacy to be at the end of your life. What would you like to be remembered for?  What do you most regret having NOT done so far in your life? If there is an answer to any of these questions write it down.

2. Make a list. Write down every single reason you have not taken action on that goal. Look at that list. Everything on that list that has to do with fear, cross off. It doesn’t count. Never run your life based on fear. Dare to fail. It’s good for you. Everything else on that list is a learning experience, not an obstacle. Start numbering them and start learning. Accept no excuses as to why you can’t learn about those things.

3. Start seeing the possibilities. Get out a new piece of paper and write down what your life will look like after you have succeeded in your goal. Will the world be a better place? Will you have improved as a person? See the vision. Make an action plan with the items that were left on your list. Make sure you put it in writing. Just thinking about it isn’t good enough.

4. Break down the vision into reachable goals. Once it starts to look doable, your confidence will start to build. Once you begin to believe it is achievable, the spark of enthusiasm will start to ignite.

5. Fan the flames. Read as much inspirational material as you can from several sources. Zig Zigler, James Allen, Jim Rohn are three sitting on my desk right now. Currently popular are The Secret and Law of Attraction. Whatever feeds your fire is great, but feed it you must, fires require oxygen and positive energy is the enthusiastic fire’s fuel.

6. Proclaim your vision to visionaries-not vampires. Sharing your goals and dreams with other like-minded positive, energetic, enthusiastic people will create a windstorm of energy flowing in your direction. You will feel the current as it swirls around, creating ideas, solutions and connections that you never even dreamed possible. Conversely, share your dreams with an energy vampire and watch them suck the life-energy and confidence right out of your soul. Stay away from them if you can, but for sure, DON’T tell them your plans!

7. Speak the language. Watch the words that are allowed to come out of your mouth. The Bible says “In the beginning was the Word, and the Word was God.” Do yourself a favor and take this one literally. Words are king! They have the power to affect thought and action. The language of enthusiasm is positive, energized, creative, fun, adventurous, electrified! Don’t speak the language of the defeated, the downtrodden, the bored, the worn out…feel how the energy goes up and down? Keep your energy supercharged with supercharged words.

8. Create a community of Enthusiasts. When I was in Real Estate, I found that the average Realtor was very competitive with other Realtors and therefore did not function in a state of community with other Realtors. It was hard to keep enthusiasm going day after day, year after year all alone in such a stressful job. That is one of the reasons that burn out in that field is very high. Several of us top-producers got together and created a small group that met monthly to brainstorm, share tips and ideas and build enthusiasm. It created synergy and made us all better than we would have been working alone. Helping others to succeed will always help you to build more excitement for yourself. It’s fun and its rewarding. Energy builds energy.

9. Absorb the Vision. Create a written one or two sentence mission statement for your goal and read it and say it out loud to yourself every day. Say it the first thing when you wake up in the morning. Say it the last thing as you are drifting off to sleep at night. Don’t fall asleep listening to the news or negative information. Fall asleep thinking about your mission, reading information about it or writing in your journal about it. You will wake up ready to hit the floor on fire!

10. Keep Physically fit. Make sure your body can keep up with your brain! Its hard to stay on fire, when you are exhausted, sick, sleep-deprived, starving or hung-over. Schedule in time for exercise breaks, healthy meals, fresh air and plenty of sleep.

Now about that second part? Like I said, it’s a work in progress.

I am not an expert on being enthusiastic with balance.

So far, what has been helping me is to create rituals that I can do automatically without thinking. The key to this is the “not thinking”part, because I will be up in my head somewhere writing or creating or wondering up a big “what if I do this?” idea for my project. Having systems and routines in place that can happen on auto-pilot has been a huge help. FlyLady.net has been a big help in getting me started with morning and evening routines that have become a daily habit.

 Here are just a few of the things that FlyLady has taught us that are making a difference in keeping me on fire without setting the house on fire too. Her website FlyLady.net will explain everything in detail.

1. Create rituals for daily maintenance items. Lay out clothes the night before, pack lunches, get the coffee ready, and her most important one…shine the sink and lay out a fresh towel! It is remarkable how lovely it is to wake up to a shiny sink!

2. Do a load of clothes every day. Wash, dry and put away. Keeping that mountain of laundry from taking over has been a huge help at our house!

3. You can’t clean clutter, get rid of it! The more I do this, the better off we are. Period. End of story.

4. Swish and swipe bathrooms as you “go”. It only takes a few minutes. Really.

5. Plan out weekly dinner menus in advance. Write them on the calendar so you don’t have to think about it, while you are busy thinking about other things!

6. Spend Fifteen Minutes. It’s amazing how much you can do in fifteen minutes. Set a timer and promise yourself that you will spend fifteen minutes on something. You will be surprised how much you get done. Start sneaking in those extra 15 minutes and they start to add up.

I would love for you to leave me your ideas on this too! Although I have come a long way, the only thing I am really good at balancing is my exercise ball! Feel free to send in your tips! I could use them!

A picnic of sandwiches, chips and soda-pop preceded the moment that we children considered the highlight of the evening, which was being allowed to escape the confines of the family station wagon and fly off to play for a half hour on the playground dwarfed by the giant screen above it.

It was a simple playground, not like the amusement park replicas our children play on today. It had a metal slide, tall with a wave in the middle, which we would cleverly slide over with a slice of our mother’s wax paper to make it far more slippery than any mother now would consider safe. It had a Merry-go-round, a cylinder disc with curved bars to hold on to- while some energetic child would hold on and run circles on the ground and teach us what could happen to children who didn’t hold on tight in this world. 

The most unique piece of equipment was the giant drum. All of the kids would cram into the drum like rats in a sewer and we would lean to one side as the drum began to move. The more we pushed, the faster it went until the force of our actions caused it to move with great speed and we all went tumbling over one and another into a screaming, laughing heap. Some of the kids would get scared and get out. Some of the kids would scream to go faster. Someone ALWAYS got hurt. It was inevitable. It was usually my sister. It was a blast.

When my crazy (fearless) sister wasn’t commandeering the drum, she was likely to found swinging from the top of good old-fashioned Monkey Bars. While more sedate and cautious children, like me, were down below examining the risks, she was shimmying up the poles, one hand after the other, climbing over slower, more hesitant children, rushing to the top. Every now and then, she would fall off. Once in awhile she would sprain or twist a body part, but she would dust herself off, find another way up and try another route, and before long there she would be again, calling for me to join her from the top…the highest Monkey in the land.

My personal favorite piece of equipment was the Teeter-Totter. I was always trying to get someone to go on the teeter-totter with me. I was fascinated by the concept of it. The fact that you couldn’t go on the Teeter-totter by yourself and have it DO anything was both a marvel and an annoyance that I couldn’t get over. I wasn’t satisfied to continue going up and down, up and down, up and down on the thing. I wanted to play on the Teeter-Totter for the same reason I kept jumping out of trees. I wanted to do the impossible. I wanted to fly- and I wanted the teeter-totter to stay suspended in perpetual balance up in the air.

The fact that I was a complete failure at this experiment-at least for more than a mere second or two at a time- never seemed to faze my cohorts or me. We would try, repeatedly, to get just the right momentum going, just the right balance, to get those both sides to match and stay suspended in space…before one side or the other would fall and we would dissolve into a fresh fit of laughter.

The signaling glow of the lightning bugs would always end our playground follies and bring us back to the movie portion of the evening. In looking back, I can’t name more than a few movies my family watched together on those mosquito nights with the scratchy little speakers pumping the sound inside our cramped car. But I do think about the lessons learned on the playground out there. The life lessons I learned by playing on “dangerous” paint-chipped equipment, which society put away long ago.

Power of Wax Paper. With a little wax paper, we can speed things up. If things are going a bit too slow or are problematic and not to our liking, we do have some control over the outcome. We can think it through, problem solve, come up with a solution and bring our own solution to the table (or slide) and not be a victim of a slow slide. We have the power to make change happen.

Truth about the Spin Cycle. The world is spinning FAST. It isn’t going to slow down for you to catch your breath, no matter how much you wish it would. If you let go, you may spin out into orbit and get conked on the head or get a fat lip. It’s your job to HOLD ON TIGHT. That doesn’t mean you always have to have a vice grip on it either. You can hold on and scream your head off or you can hold on, laugh your head off, and have fun. You are still in control. But YOU CAN’T LET GO.

Teamwork Turns the Drum. As long as we all worked together to keep the giant drum turning, it didn’t matter if we went fast, slow or in-between. It only mattered that we communicated and worked together. Then we could have fun. As soon as everyone only started thinking for themselves, people fell over, got trampled and got hurt.

Falling isn’t Failure. My sister wasn’t failing every time she fell off of the Monkey bars. She was learning a better, faster way to shimmy up to the top. Soon, there wasn’t a kid from miles around who could climb up there faster than she could. The rest of us were still trying to figure things out from down below, staring up. Rarely do we learn looking up, we learn looking down at where we’ve been.

Life’s a Teeter Totter. The bad, really sad news is that life isn’t going to balance. Our teeter-totters, balls, balloons, marbles or anything else we try to juggle and toss up there aren’t going to stay suspended in perfectly balanced animation NO MATTER HOW HARD we try, and no matter how hard we WISH, or VISUALIZE them too.

Remembering that Life is a Teeter-Totter, we realize that we aren’t playing out here all alone. Many of us have trouble balancing our lives because we try to do it in a vacuum- and then are surprised when Life and people get in the way. We design the perfect balance plan and someone walks in with an important need and hand-grenades our strategy to bits. Their turn up, our turn down. We must ALSO build in times for our turn at UP. Because if we don’t…it might not come. We have to bring our own wax paper and make things happen for ourselves. We can’t wait for it. We need to start now. We can also shoot for those rare moments of middle ground. Just don’t expect them to be the norm.

Remembering that life is a teeter-totter, we realize that just because we haven’t achieved the perfect Zen of life balance doesn’t mean we are failing. It means we are learning. We are growing new ideas and expanding our understanding about who we are as authentic human beings in communion with other authentic human beings. Sometimes we get caught up in feeling as if we are the only ones in the spin cycle. Not true. We are all in the Drum together and we can keep it turning through better communication, compassion and teamwork. Teamwork keeps us from tripping over each other. TRUE LIFE BALANCE comes as we grow as individuals and in community with each other.

You can’t ride the Teeter-Totter alone.  

 This post is being submitted as part of the Life Balance Group Writing Project at Create a Balance

Rainy Days and Mondays always get me down.

Isn’t that what Karen Carpenter taught us back in 1971? A gloomy rainy Monday is a good enough reason to call in the depression? I don’t usually have that reaction. A good rainy Monday might feel like a slower more relaxed start, or I might not feel like hitting the ground running at warp speed but a little rain doesn’t usually have the power to make me want to throw the covers back over my head.  What’s funny is that all these years later a good rainy Monday will get me thinking about that song. It was one of my favorites back then, all the way back then when I was eleven and really believed that a rainy Monday was as good a reason as any other to throw in the towel and give in to the gloomy attitude that was always hovering just one raincloud over my pre-teen head. Everything seemed like a near-tragedy back then. Now I look at the words and I wonder what in the world I was thinking to listen to that garbage.

RAINY DAYS AND MONDAYS

Talkin’ to myself and feelin’ old
Sometimes I’d like to quit
Nothing ever seems to fit
Hangin’ around
Nothing to do but frown
Rainy Days and Mondays always get me down.

What I’ve got they used to call the blues
Nothin’ is really wrong
Feelin’ like I don’t belong
Walkin’ around
Some kind of lonely clown
Rainy Days and Mondays always get me down.

Funny but it seems I always wind up here with you
Nice to know somebody loves me
Funny but it seems that it’s the only thing to do
Run and find the one who loves me.

What I feel has come and gone before
No need to talk it out
We know what it’s all about
Hangin’ around
Nothing to do but frown
Rainy Days and Mondays always get me down.

Then I remember. There are days that people…and I am one of them, really do feel like that once in awhile. There are some people that feel like that most of the time. There are a few people that feel like that ALL of the time.

Feeling like they want to quit, feeling like nothing fits. Feeling like they don’t belong, some kind of lonely clown, hangin’ around, with nothing to do but frown…

Are we there to encourage them? Are we going to be the ones they come running to for a little encouragement? The one they will run to, to find the one who loves them?

OR do we get impatient. Do we tell them to snap out of it, this won’t last, it’s only Monday, the sun will come out tomorrow…bet your bottom dollar…

Do we listen or do we deflect?

Are we a haven in their storm? A beacon? A light?

I have to be careful. Because sometimes in my earnest attempt at being positive and hopeful, I push so hard at the darkness that I risk pushing away the person feeling consumed with the darkness. They can’t separate themselves enough from it to realize that I’m not pushing THEM away. I don’t want to do that. I want to encourage, love, comfort, be that haven from the rain that they so desperately need.

I try to be aware. But it’s tricky. On rainy Mondays, maybe because of that silly song, I am more aware. It reminds me to be thoughtful. It reminds me that some people are feeling like that and I need to be sensitive and alert. Not just blundering through with my Pollyanna attitudes and platitudes expecting that everyone else is having a good day too.

When I say “How’s your day?” I mean it…I’m trying to look carefully and with sensitivity to what’s going on. And yes…I should be doing this on sunny days too. It’s a good reminder for every day.

But that Karen…she belted out a message that is going to stick with me forever…and somehow Rainy Days and Mondays always get me…

More Aware.

He feels as if he can’t compete with her fantasy romance novel world and the perfect heroes inside. She fears she can’t transcend being buried in mommyland all day long to become a desirable wife. She feels unnoticed, unappreciated, unloved…He feels like she doesn’t understand the pressure he is dealing with at work, he feels worthless, unsupported, uncared for.

Neither of them feel as if they are being listened to. Both of them desire someone to talk to. Both of them crave companionship. They long to share their deepest fears, their deepest needs with someone…anyone…

And yet..there they sit…in silence…alone…together.

I think this may be the saddest play I have ever been in. Saddest because it just ends with them sitting there. Never speaking to each other. Making the choice to stay lonely. Making the choice not to speak the desires of their hearts. Not to reach out to each other and grab on to love.

When it is right there next to them all the time.

How many times has this been you or me? How many times has the need for love been right there on the tip of your tongue and you have pushed it down, shoved it back into the corner of your heart, turned out the lights and sat in the dark alone when maybe, just maybe if you had taken the chance, reached out, spoken from the heart, someone might have listened, someone might have responded.

I know I have. I know there have been times I have bit my tongue and walked away, spent the night hashing over all the things I could of said in the repeat tape player in my mind.

It doesn’t have to be that way. The truth is that we all feel inadequate, alone, unloved and not good enough at one time or another.There is no shame in being able to share these thoughts out loud once in awhile with a trusted friend. There is no shame in reaching out to our loved ones and taking that hand, holding on for support, being honest with our emotions, sharing from the depths of our hearts.

The truth is that this is what builds deep bonds. Honesty. Trust. Knowing we can depend on sharing our true feelings with each other and not be hurt. But you have to be willing to risk those emotions in order to get to those friendships. You have to take a chance. It’s a risk…yes…but one that can have an amazing pay off. There just might be that someone waiting to listen, waiting to share, waiting to give love.

Or…you can just sit in silence. Alone.

It’s a choice.

Talk from the heart. It’s SO worth it.

Those of you who have been long time followers of Life’s Little Inspirations may know by now that one of my major passions in life is the concept of Community.

Unfortunately, in the blogging world, I worry sometimes that the word community  may get a bit watered down as we use that word to mean our own little group of conversationalists who sit around and chat and joke and carry on around the blogosphere water cooler. And while that is precious to me and I adore all of you, the word COMMUNITY has a much larger and much more powerful meaning to me.

To me, the concept of community is a place full of hope and passion and responsibility and love for each other. It is a word that means family, friendship, brotherhood and taking care of one and another. A word that means responsibility, teamwork, caring and love. Looking out for each other. Being a part of something. Never being alone. Sharing. Not letting each other down. Being my brother’s keeper. Doing my part for the good of everyone else.

I have a vision of being a part of a world community.  In THAT Community, the members would look out for each other and care for each other as one giant family. People wouldn’t isolate themselves to their *own* kind and only help those who shared their own beliefs or their own physical features. We would finally understand that we ARE all one, that we share beating hearts that love, and blood that bleeds, hands that can help and heal.

We CAN end poverty in our lifetime. We can end it by becoming the family and community that we are capable of being if we join together. If we can share the vision that we are so much more then the petty differences that keep us apart. We can end poverty If we can learn to search for the common ground of what is good in each of us and search for the love inside of each other by listening and caring and building each other up. No more tearing each other apart, no more hunting for the negative side, we need to learn to be hands that heal, hands that help, hands that feed, hands that teach. Then…we will be hands that end poverty.

As bloggers, we are already one step closer. We have already torn down the barriers that divide us. We have begun to create the communities here on our blogs. With wonderful awareness events such as Blog Action day we can shine a light on poverty, suffering, hunger and other social issues that need our attention if we will only use the amazing power that we have as bloggers and writers to make a difference.

One of my favorite women is Mother Teresa. She dedicated her life to fighting poverty. Even now, she continues to inspire countless people in the fight against poverty. It seems fitting to let her words speak today to inspire us to make a difference when it feels like nothing we can do will even make a dent in the struggles that we all face together.

 
Do It Anyway

~Sign In Mother Teresa’s Office

 

People are unreasonable,
illogical, and self-centered,

LOVE THEM ANYWAY

If you do good, people will
accuse you of selfish,
ulterior motives,

DO GOOD ANYWAY

If you are successful, you win
false friends and true enemies,

SUCCEED ANYWAY

The good you do will
be forgotten tomorrow,

DO GOOD ANYWAY

Honesty and frankness
make you vulnerable,

BE HONEST AND FRANK ANYWAY

What you spent years building
may be destroyed overnight,

BUILD ANYWAY

People really need help but
may attack you if you help them,

HELP PEOPLE ANYWAY

Give the world the best you
have and you’ll get kicked
in the teeth,

GIVE THE WORLD THE BEST YOU’VE GOT ANYWAY.

 The world needs us, all of us, to make a commitment to live as a loving community dedicated to world peace without hunger. Will you join this world community? How can you help?

The morning air is cool and crisp in the Midwest now as October paints autumn leaves in vibrant reds and golds. Puffs of breath fog the air from early walks with the dog and crystals of dew glitter on blades of grass as the sun rises in the sky. It’s last call on beautiful weather. Last call on clear blue skies and days that gradually warm with each hour of the rising sun until the perfect 75 degrees hits the mark.

In the garden, the tomatoes are slower to brighten to their orange-red glow. The yield is thinner and each glorious fruit is more precious than the last, each meaty slice full of juicy flavor. 

Our favorite way to eat the garden tomatoes are to slice them thin, sprinkle lightly with a little sea salt, top with freshly torn basil leaves right from the garden and drizzle with aged balsamic vinegar. A mouth-watering delight worth dreaming about all year long, it can only be done with vine-fresh tomatoes. Anything less isn’t worth the effort.

 Every October, with the first heavy frost looming on the horizon, the tomatoes seem to taste even better. Or perhaps they are just more appreciated knowing they will soon be gone again until next June. I daydream of building a greenhouse over the garden to stretch out the days. A fool’s dream, but one I have every year- designing the greenhouse in my mind, envisioning the ability to harvest fresh fruits and vegetables all through the brutal winter chill.

I want to make these precious days last. I want to savor every juicy moment, harvest every golden memory, bask in the wamth of the last lingering days of sun.

And although the season is short, I hang on tight to each day, fully appreciating the little time that is left. Time to finish up those last few summer dreams. Time to finish up those final chores that can be done outside while the weather holds. Time for a few more picnics, bike rides through the forest preserves, hikes through the woods.

Time for a few more tomatoes while they are still on the vine. I don’t want to waste a single one.

The average dog has one request to all humankind. Love me.

~Helen Exley

My beloved Maggie, my Golden Retriever has obviously NOT been keeping up with the daily news. She remains blissfully unaware that we are immersed in a political campaign that is highly more effective at making people laugh on Saturday Night Live than actually solving the world’s problems. She does not know that for some people, my great grandmother’s advice of saving our money under mattresses and in sock drawers is starting to sound like sage advice indeed. She does occasionally cock her pretty little head from side to side if people start to have conversations that take on a worried tone and will be happy to come up to you to lick all of your troubles away and let you know that there is still plenty of fun to be had out here.

She will be happy to frolic and run with you, jump through her hool-a-hoop, show you her outstanding collection of stuffed animals that she proudly carries all over the house and if you are interested, will engage in a playful game of tug-a-war.

She is much more interested in the idea that company will come and visit, that the birds will stop by the bird feeders in the garden and that her primary job of keeping rabbits out of the vegetable garden is well done.

Maggie is happy every single day. Blissfully, joyfully, simplistically grateful for a bowl of food, children to play with and the honor of being by my side. ( Pretty exciting, I know) She doesn’t seem to yearn or strive for the things that wait off in the distance, tempting and taunting the rest of us. She has everything she needs.

She has love. She has family. She has food. She gets to work some everyday and play some everyday.

And she gets to take a nap whenever she wants one.

Simple? For a dog maybe.

For us? It’s harder, but it can be done. If we can’t live our entire life living the life of a dog, can we take little Maggie breaks? Can we squeeze in little non-worry moments to turn off the world in our heads and just play, focus on the simple wonderful things that life is still offering in the middle of the daily storm? Can we find the fun? Do we remember to look?

Can we schedule in time for a nap or time for tea or time for meditation?

One thing that Maggie is great at every day is balance. I could learn a lot from my dog. She runs around like a nut, giving everything her entire focus, energy and attention. Then she is done. She just stops. Time for A REST. She doesn’t look guilty about it either. She just goes and lays on her blanket and checks out for awhile. Then she comes back fully restored, happy again to give it her all.

She spends ZERO amount of time thinking about the bad stuff. Only about the things in her world that she can control. Worry doesn’t bog her down. She is too busy looking forward to the next fun moment up ahead. As long as we are going to be around to play and hang out, all the world is good for her.

I think she has her priorities in order.

I’m off for some playtime and then…maybe a nap.

I don’t measure a man’s success by how high he climbs but how high he bounces when he hits bottom
~George S. Patton. 

 I have failed at least forty-five times already this week. And no-I’m not keeping count. That is probably a low estimate. It is safe to say that in the world of trying to build a new addition to this website and doing it on my own that…

I AM A FAILURE

Big deal, so what, who cares. The job still has to get done. It’s on the goal list. It has a deadline. It’s part of the plan.

I feel like shoving the whole thing aside and going out for a run or just reading everyone else’s blogs instead. Make some nice comments. Eat chocolate. Eat more chocolate. Do my nails.

That won’t fix anything. You will still be a failure when you get back. You still won’t know how to create what you want. You’ll just be fatter…with nice nails.

But I feel like I am hitting my head against the wall, I’m going in circles and I’m getting dizzy. I’ve sunk to the bottom and I can’t get up. I don’t know where to go from here.

PERFECT. THEN THE ONLY PLACE TO GO IS UP

Look around, get some help, send in the reinforcements, cry out, admit your need, call in the Cavalry but whatever you do…DON’T GIVE UP. The bottom of the barrel is the perfect place to view the sky. Sometimes you can get the best perspective from there. Creativity often comes just before the proverbial towel has been thrown. Failure is a brutal but brilliant teacher. There is nothing like getting out in the trenches and feeling the sting of messing it up to really build the desire of learning.

Get Stubborn. Find your Inner Yorkshire Terrier if you have to. Grab on to the ankle of that giant problem and shake it until it comes toppling down. Take ten steps, take a deep breath and then take ten more. Keep on trudging but don’t you dare quit.

 AS LONG AS YOU ARE BREATHING, SUCCESS IS AN OPTION

 There is a way. There is a solution. There is someone who knows the answer. There is someone who can help unlock the door. Go ask, go find, search, learn, get better. GROW.

 AS I FAIL, I WILL SUCCEED

 UPDATE:  The cavalry has arrived. Hurray for Angels! I have learned. I have figured it out. Mission complete. Huge Thanks to my daughter Lucky who rode in to save the day!

 One task checked off the Life’s Little Inspirations check list…

 Now presenting our new Life’s Little Inspirations Bookstore! INSPIRED BOOKS. Check it out! And believe me…it took a LOT OF FAILURE, a LOT OF STUBBORNNESS and a LOT OF HELP to make that happen!